Post-Olympic letter to China

Dear China,

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.  I have always thought of myself as loving and inclusive. Especially toward you, with your delicious General Tso’s chicken and frustratingly fun finger traps. I think of you often, especially when I check the tags of my consumer goods. I never thought it would come to this, but ever since the torch was lit earlier this month in London, I have felt a change within me.

The truth is, China, I think I might hate you. The reason is this: since the Olympic Games began, I’ve heard myself saying things like, “I don’t care if we win as long as we beat China,” and “I don’t care who wins as long as it’s not China” and “I hate China.” 

I’m not sure how this happened. I never wanted to hate anyone, least of all you, especially in light of our very intimate economic arrangement.

Why would this emotion flare up within me during the Olympics of all things? A time when different countries are meant to come together and celebrate each other, when we are expected to put political conflict aside, when international unity is supposed to be forged.

I long for the days of the 1936 Berlin Olympics, 1980 Moscow Olympics, and the 1984 Los Angeles Olympics. I do not understand how a sports competition could have come to this.

Yet I know that there is a motive, a reason to these seemingly irrational feelings. It all started during the medal ceremonies, when I realized that sometimes I did not have the highest vantage point. I looked down at my feet and saw a two or a three.

Sometimes there was no number at all. But there you were, China, standing at number one.

I’m terribly sorry for bringing this up, but I’m afraid you’ve been standing in the wrong place. You see, dear, I’m number one. That spot is reserved for me. I worked hard. I earned it. I’m special.

I hope that following the correction of this error, all of this hostility will subside. That we can return to the healthy, symbiotic relationship our countries have shared since the 1970s.

One in which I, America, can still be number one, and you, China, can be whatever else there is. Doesn’t that sound nice? 

Please, let us continue the relationship started all those years ago by Nixon, good, honest man that he was. I do not want to hate you. We should not be enemies.

So, to inaugurate a new beginning, I have a proposal: You should just give me back the gold medals you stole from me and we can put this silly “hate” nonsense behind us.
 
Sincerely,

USA

­— casefarr@indiana.edu