Awards, schmawards

If there’s one thing you’ve learned in 2007, let it be this: Awards don’t matter. Sure, Kanye West will tell you differently – but he might be the only one.\nIn 2006, Lily Allen garnered widespread success for her album, “Alright, Still.” She also became notorious for dropping truth bombs about everything from her fellow artists to – you guessed it – awards. When Lily was nominated for four Brit Awards – that’s the British equivalent of the Grammys – she told MTV news she would not win any of them. She stated that the judging committee were predominantly Universal Records insiders, so an obvious bias is formed. Lily, an EMI artist, did turn out empty handed that night, while a majority of the winners were on Universal Records. Sometimes, it’s just about politics.\nOur Grammy Awards are equally insignificant. In fact, artists that shine at the Grammys are usually subsequently cursed. Lauryn Hill cleaned up at the 1998 awards with her album “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill,” winning four awards, including “Album of the Year.” Nowadays, you’ll see Lauryn is much like Whitney Houston during her Bobby Brown years. Norah Jones also scored big in the 2003 Grammys, winning five out of the eight awards she was nominated for. Four years later, Jones is only there to fill in the empty space at the CD rack at Starbucks.\nThe same curse can be applied to the Academy Awards. Cuba Gooding Jr. seemed like he had Hollywood at his fingertips when he won Best Supporting Actor for Jerry Maguire in 1996. Since then, Gooding has not appeared in a movie even worth renting. His most unmemorable films include “Snow Dogs,” “Pearl Harbor” and “Daddy Day Camp.” It will be hard to ever forgive Halle Berry for her performance in “Catwoman” after her Best Actress Award for Monster’s Ball. Sure, in the golden years of Hollywood, an Academy Award really meant something. There was once a time when Grammys honored a talented musician as well. \nAs anyone can learn from last week’s episode of “30 Rock,” awards can sometimes only be self-esteem boosters. Actors and artists can often be more insecure than one can imagine. And it is the job of their bosses, who become their subsequent caretakers, to acknowledge them with fabricated awards. Tina Fey did this by sending award statues made of cookies or staging a fake satellite acceptance speech for the Pacific Rim Emmys. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then you are missing out on the best show on television right now. \nPerhaps we should take an example of Woody Allen, who doesn’t even screen his films for competition at film festivals. And while he has consistently been nominated for and awarded Academy Awards, he refuses to acknowledge any of them.\nSo whether you’re making movies or albums or whatever, don’t do it for the possible fame or the glory. Do it because you can’t imagine doing anything else – and don’t end up like Lauryn Hill.