What time is it?

Tick tock, tick tock, tick tock, tick tock. This might be the most annoying sound in the world (unless you count the sound of “last call!” that rings out every night at the pub, but I wouldn’t call that annoyance sound-based, per se). Is it your biological clock ticking? The sound of a battery-operated alarm clock? A little reminder that you are, as usual, late for class? The sound that has you fixed in your seat listening to a boring lecture for the next hour? Or just the noise driving you nuts when you’re going to sleep?\nHowever, the tick tock of the clock, no matter how annoying, does regulate in standard terms the amount of time we Hoosiers have to complete the day’s tasks. I hate it. You hate it. But it’s a fact of life. And so, whenever we wake up, are expected to be somewhere, want to know when happy hour starts or are just curious, we ask the question: \n“What time is it?”\nUnfortunately for us, Indiana is about as clear on this point as the musings of Plato are to an engineering major. Five counties in the humble crossroads of America could move back to the Eastern time zone when daylight saving time ends \non Nov. 4. Citing worker and business hardships, the counties did \nnot see an increase in profit and suffered cut-off between suppliers \nand consumers living in different time zones.\nThe constant confusion about Indiana time zones angers me. Why? I’m afraid that it will seriously affect my love life. How, you ask? Observe this scenario:\nI attend a conference in St. Louis one weekend. While there I meet the girl of my dreams. I see children, a white picket fence and a frikkin’ cocker spaniel – the whole nine yards. And what luck, she’s from Indiana, too! I live in Warrick County at the time, which is on Central Time. She lives in Dubois County (which is one of the five seeking a change back to Eastern Time). We arrange a meeting back in Indiana the following week. As she leaves, she says, “I love you.” I’ve got it bad. \nAnd so I arrive at the designated coffee shop at 3 p.m., just as we had arranged, ready to begin a long, beautiful relationship. Unfortunately for me, it’s actually 4 p.m. in Dubois County. After waiting for 45 minutes, the girl, deciding that she has been stood up, leaves the shop. \nOn her way out, she runs into an Italian man named Agapeto (which in variant form means “beloved”). Believing her to be the most beautiful woman in the world, he woos her, and they fall in love. Now my soul mate is sailing the Mediterranean with this Agapeto, who has opened doors in the physical realm I have never dreamed of (and believe me, I dream really big). I’m pissed and hate my home state.\nBottom line? Let’s just get one time zone and stop such mistakes before they happen. My love life depends on it.