Just plain trashy

Have you ever read the packaging instructions on something you just bought and thought, "Well, duh! That's obvious"? A Web site that documents stupid instructions mentions, for instance, a Superman costume that came with this warning: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." \nSadly, the fact that the manufacturer felt the need to make known such a common-sense caveat implies that someone has actually tried to mimic the tights-clad, crime-fighting "man of steel" himself. It's the same logic behind the label on Marks and Spencer bread pudding that reads, "Product will be hot after heating."\nHere at IU, we have our own share of ridiculous admonitions. Directly outside the Business/SPEA Library sits a line of recycling containers whose lids are emblazoned with these words of caution: "No hot ashes." Seems pretty straightforward, doesn't it? \nBut according to IU Physical Plant director Hank Hewetson, a few years ago there was apparently an epidemic of pyromania that caused a student to set fire to several waste-disposal receptacles. If no one had ever done so, these words of warning would not be necessary. But on our campus, students have long been engaging in behavior that can only be described as "trashy."\nDespite the large number of waste receptacles strategically placed around campus, the streets around campus are often lined with Polar Pops or whatever type of promotional literature the evangelical of the day was passing out in front of Ballantine Hall. Even when waste does make it into receptacles, it is often the wrong one. Although there may be a newspaper recycling bin two feet away from it, it is not uncommon to see a trash bin overflowing with used copies of the IDS. The number of trees that met their ends only to be thrown in among the "ABC" gum and half-eaten Doritos is sadly quite large. \nIt seems wrong that, after the reader has briefly skimmed the news and become hopelessly confused by the enigma that is "Blender Kitty," the opportunity to reuse it is passed up. Feel free to line your birdcage with this column -- I won't be offended, I swear! Just don't let it go to waste. \nAnd while I applaud the students who do clean up their garbage and make an effort to recycle, there seems to be an issue ensuring that what goes in the bin is appropriate. Having the wrong material contaminate the other recyclables can ruin the whole load. For instance, the recycling bin was probably not the ideal place to deposit the pair of shoes or the drapes that the folks from the physical plant found interspersed with legitimate, recyclable waste. There is, after all, a difference -- albeit subtle -- between Nikes and empty SpaghettiO's cans.\nBut if you are a hard-core litterbug and cannot break your dirty habit, I ask only this: If you are disposed to protest recycling by "fighting fire with fire," find another way to indulge your pyromania. And next time you pick up a Superman costume, it's your decision if you want to go around campus jumping off of buildings.\nJust don't say that I didn't warn you.