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I was wondering if a certain vibrator is better than another (i.e. clitoral vibrator vs. G-spot vibrator). I have never used a vibrator before and would like to know if one is better than the other for first time users — and for women who have never orgasmed. I do know that I enjoy being on top more than anything else while having sex. I would think that means I like G-spot stimulation better, but I’d like a separate opinion. Also, any recommendations on a specific vibrator?
Great question. There is no single vibrator that’s better than all the others because so much of it has to do with individual taste.
I often recommend a basic silver bullet vibrator like the one available from Early to Bed. I recommend this kind because it’s affordable and has a multi-speed dial that goes from very light stimulation to very intense vibration, so you can find out as a beginner what you like. It’s for clitoral stimulation only, though, so please do not insert it into the vagina.
If you think you’d rather go with a vaginal vibrator, there are many good G-spot vibrators or regular smooth vibrators you may find pleasurable to use. If you’d like to see a variety for yourself, you might enjoy an in-home sex toy party like those by Pure Romance or Passion Parties, or to stop by a sex boutique so you can hold some in your hands, turn them on and see how intense or loud or quiet they are, and so on.
In my first book, “Because It Feels Good,” I included an entire chapter about the different kinds of vibrators and other sex toys, including information about how to keep vibrators clean and how to talk about them with a partner. Since you mentioned not having yet experienced ?orgasm, I’d also like to recommend the book “Becoming Orgasmic” to you.
It’s an older book, so the information on vibrators and other sex toys is out of date, but the tips and suggestions related to experiencing orgasm remain spot-on decades later. I still recommend this book often to my female college students and to other women who are interested in learning to have their first orgasm, and I often hear back that it has helped them to do so. You can learn more about this book and about sex toys and sexual pleasure more generally on our Kinsey Confidential website.
Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., MPH is an associate professor at IU and a Research Fellow and sexual health educator at the Kinsey Institute. She’s the author of six books about sex; her newest is “The Coregasm Workout.” Follow Kinsey Confidential on Twitter @KinseyCon and visit us online at www.KinseyConfidential.org.
