Encountering the ‘real world’

We all like the idea of sequestering an adult world of pain, poverty and confusion. Perhaps it makes us feel a little bit stronger for having come upon it and survived. Perhaps we think it makes us important as the guardians of the underworld. 

Or perhaps the old sentimentality really is true and we just can’t stand the thought of the inexperienced suffering at the hands of something so cruel as life. But whatever the reasons, one has to wonder at the continuing logic that speaks against telling children the truths of the “real world.”

This past week, a pair of incidents in British schools brought such judgments to the forefront. 

First, there was teacher Andrea Charman, who decided to teach her class about the realities of farming, including the end-of-the-road slaughterhouse for a lamb that the students fostered. Not only did protesters insist that Charman was, in fact, a murderer, they also pointed to her permanent and deep-rooted desire to corrupt and wound the sensibilities of the younger generation.

Now, sure, anyone can see that maybe it’s not a great plan to butcher your own pet. But it’s hardly an act of indelible corruption to teach children (many of whom came from farm homes in the first place) about the process behind the food on their plates.

Not far from the first episode, a second clash of sensitivities occurred when administrators at Ashcombe Primary School chose to ban Valentine’s Day traditions as a protection against the harsh feelings that come with first rejections. Teachers emphasized the gloomy and cheerless effects of holiday celebrations, despite sharing their own joyful reminiscences when further probed.

Why do adults seem so sure that the very things that didn’t traumatize them as children somehow will traumatize the next generation? Perhaps people overestimate out of a real compassion; however, adults miss the truly important things about the situation when they oversimplify the consequences.

Children are resilient members of the same world to which adults belong. There isn’t a magic marker line written somewhere between the world of make-believe tea parties and the world of complex relationships and brutality, as much as we want there to be one.

Besides, what is this “real world” we’re all sure is so miserable? Maybe we think it’s a special place just because we live there. Maybe children have known about it all along in a far more sophisticated way than we imagine.

Have you talked to any children lately? Their understanding might not be the same as our understanding, but in most instances it is just as thorough. The segregation of generations based on their ability to endure hardship is an invisible partition that cannot be mimicked by real-life events.

The truth is, we don’t have all the pain and ignorance of the world wrapped up in neat little bows to be handed out at age 18. If we did, there would be quite a few 18-year-olds all over the planet dropping dead from shock and awe.


E-mail: cmcglass@indiana.edu