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Friday, March 29
The Indiana Daily Student

I've never written a headline

If you are reading this online-only column, you may also be the sort of person who played Sink the Biz last night, or ordered the seitan special at Roots Restaurant. \nIn other words, you belong to a cult.\nOK, not exactly a cult, but you probably wouldn’t qualify to become a Nielsen family, either. \nI was wondering why Sink the Biz, a pretty fun game, has not caught on at any other bars, or even with my friends who go to other schools. It’s kinda like you have to be at Nick’s, or it’s hopelessly out of context.\nI was also pondering why bother to write a column that nobody sees, and wondering what this has to do with the whine of newsprint psychics who say newspapers will be dead in a few years because we will all read our news online. \nThinking the psychics are wrong. Because this column, like the other online columns hosted by the Indiana Daily Student, is out of context. Off the beaten path, if you will. \nDoes something have to be common for us to notice it, talk about it, integrate it into our lives? Are we scared to try new stuff? \nFor example, until today, I never considered becoming a hobo, but that’s definitely one of those little-known career paths that could be a hidden gem. The pay is low, but so is your overhead. No commuting expenses because that’s just your job. You meet interesting people, learn unusual graffiti techniques and sleep late. Something to think about.\nUntil today, I never considered learning Urdu, playing ultimate Frisbee or growing my hair into dreadlocks. I have never drank hot red-zinger tea, played darts professionally, ridden in the Little 500 or run for public office.\nI’ve never gone cliff diving at the rock quarry, or hang gliding or parasailing. I’ve never even written a column that was only 400 words instead of the regulation 500.\nPart of me has been thinking – only five weeks of school left, only five weeks of crazy left. Only five weeks until I join mainstream society and never do anything fun again.\nIt’s not like I have never done anything new or unusual. I admit to being a Sink the Biz player, and a very good one, too. I’ve never tried seitan, but I do wander through online columns once in awhile. \nIt just seems like the fun and the exploration is coming to an end, but I also know that’s not really true. Life doesn’t end at graduation; it just changes. \nSome people turn 22 and worry the best years of their lives are under their belts, but that shows a lack of creativity. It’s important to resist the daily grind and do something original, something slightly uncomfortable every once in a while, and that doesn’t stop when you graduate from college.\nAnd if I want some seitan or red-zinger tea, by golly, I’ll just go get some.

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