Corporal 'Punish'-ment

Marvel Comics has gotten a lot of mileage out of a simple premise: Vietnam special operations vet Frank Castle comes home only to see his family gunned down in a gangland firefight. He experiences a psychotic break, dons a skull t-shirt and begins laying waste to criminals, hoodlums and anyone who looks at him sideways. Easy enough, right?\nIn 1989, the first film adaptation was released starring Dolph Lundgren and it sucked horribly. Thomas Jane was chosen to redeem the skull logo in this year's adaptation of the character and does so passably well. One can only imagine how awesome this movie would have been if the screenplay wasn't a pile of crap.\nIn Jonathan Hensleigh's version, Castle is a Gulf War vet working undercover for the FBI in Florida. Henslieigh goes to great lengths to set up the story, build sympathy for Castle's family and give birth to 'The Punisher.' Hensleigh adds unnecessary plot conventions and then leaves them unresolved -- for example, Frank (who in the Marvel Universe lives in secret, presumed dead) challenges the police openly. The police never reappear in the film. Not during car chases, gun battles or explosions. NOT ONCE. \nWho knows if the cast performed poorly or if they were handicapped by bad writing. Rebecca Romijn-Stamos is wooden and John Travolta is a rehashed Bond villain with diabolical hair. I half expected him to start rambling on about $5 milkshakes. Only a handful of characters are developed beyond caricature and the whole production leaves me feeling like I watched a less-compelling remake of "Commando." \nLike so many comic book adapters, Hensleigh shows ambivalence towards the material, as if he's continually asking himself, "Should I make it camp or play it straight?" It seems no one learned a thing from Tim Burton's "Batman," which proved that fanciful material treated seriously has broad appeal. Hensleigh's ambivalence created a movie which will disappoint fans and confuse the casual viewer. \nThe beauty of The Punisher is that he starts killing in anger but keeps killing because he likes it. He is a boogeyman who enforces lofty principles with savage violence. Too self-conscious to be a great action movie and too clumsy to be an engaging psychological portrait of a grieving man's quest, "The Punisher" falls on its face. Frank Castle has suffered enough; let's pray that Hollywood lays him to rest for good.