We want Keggy!

When you are looking for a college to meet your educational demands, many factors come into play. The beauty of the campus, class sizes, reputation of the school, extracurricular activities and social scene can all play a major part in where you decide to commit four years of your time and thousands of dollars in order to become an intellectual.\nAh, but there is one factor that is routinely overlooked, a factor many underestimate:\nThe mascot.\nAh, yes ... the mighty mascot, the physical representation of all that is your chosen institution of higher learning. It is the proud symbol of everything you stand for, adorning every T-shirt with its powerful visage. We've all seen the Wildcats, Bearcats, Bulldogs and Cardinals, for they have become the most common and cliché mascots.\nBut many schools strive for a little more creativity.\nThe Big 12 has the Longhorns, Sooners and Jayhawks (which aren't even real birds). The SEC has the Gators, Razorbacks and Gamecocks (popularized by dudes in white baseball hats everywhere, many of which who can't hear the words "bush," "head" and "beaver" without giggling). The ACC has been a little more adventurous, dabbling in the occult with Duke's Blue Devils and Wake Forest's Demon Deacons. Maryland has shown the most audacity of the conference, choosing the mighty terrapin, a fighting turtle, to represent its student body's competitive spirit.\nWay to go, guys.\nWe rarely ever hear about the Ivy League's mascots. Maybe because they're too busy taking over the world, or maybe because they just suck at sports. \nRegardless, it is strange that a controversy has erupted about the choice of a new school mascot at one of the nation's finest schools.\nDartmouth is in a strange predicament that many of us at IU can empathize with: they don't have an anthropomorphic school mascot. Lately the students have taken it upon themselves to aid the situation and offer up some suggestions.\nThe most popular of the bunch has come from the writers of Jack-o-Lantern, the school's humor publication. (We here at IU also have a humorous publication; it's called the IDS Weekend … just kidding.) They have created Keggy, a bipod beer keg with a huge smile on his face that has been entertaining crowds young and old at recent football games.\n"We tried to come up with a mascot that wasn't racist, biased or sexist, yet entirely unacceptable," Keggy creator Nic Duquette told The Dartmouth, the school's newspaper.\nExpected to be ejected from the game, Keggy was surprisingly invited by the school marching band on to the field and was asked to sign autographs at a hockey game later in the week. \nConclusion: Everyone loves Keggy!\nWell, almost everyone.\nThe expected backlash from parents of perspective and current students has flooded The Dartmouth's mailboxes.\n"I think choosing Keggy as the mascot would not reassure the parents of future prospective freshmen," said Lance Labun of Tempe, Arizona, whose son is thinking about attending Dartmouth. \nI know what would reassure Mr. Labun: the fact he's sending his son to a damn Ivy League school!\nYes, Dartmouth has a reputation for drinking. Great. So did Mickey Mantle and look how far he got. A mascot is no indication of an educational institution's reputation, even if it's a gigantic beer keg who can dance.\nLabun elaborates, "Picture yourself in 30 years trying to impress the guy across the boardroom table by the fact that you went to Dartmouth and says: 'Yeah, Dartmouth, isn't that the school that's mascot is a beer keg?'"\nIf I'm the guy across the boardroom table, that dude gets a high five and the job.