Signs from God

While driving back to IU from a Memorial Day weekend in Michigan (and I'd like to point out that Memorial Day weekend is kind of an oxymoron), I saw a sign on State Road 37 that caught my attention. On a big black billboard were the words, "Looking for a sign from God?" Not more than a hundred feet beyond it was another black sign that said, "God Rules!" \nI was confused and amused. If God actually did put the "God Rules" sign up, don't you think he's a little arrogant? I mean sure, maybe he created the world, but that's no reason to put himself on such a high and mighty pedestal. I love myself, but I'd never put a sign up along a highway that says "Brad rules." OK, maybe in the cover of darkness I would, but that's not the point. Also, why is God talking in the third person? Does he always talk like this? Does God go to Wendy's and say, "God would like a Big Bacon Classic"? It just isn't adding up for me.\nIt seems like almost anywhere you go in this country, you can find a sign about God or his only begotten son. You can find a message about God or Jesus on church kiosks, billboards, sides of buildings and the bumpers of cars. I have to admit, I'm a little confused. I saw a sign at a church outside Nashville, Ind., that read, "Home of Jesus." Later in the day, I saw a billboard that read, "Coming soon: Jesus." A mile before I saw another sign outside a church reading, "Jesus welcomes you in." And sure enough, as I got back into Bloomington, I saw a bumper sticker:\n"I found Jesus, he's in my trunk." \nSomebody is lying to me. From what the signs taught me, Jesus lives in a church outside Nashville, yet he's apparently coming soon to make an appearance at the billboard four miles down the road from his home; but of course, he has to schedule that around welcoming people in at the church that's a mile away and preaching to the groceries in some dude's trunk. \nI don't mind people taking pride in their religion and putting it on display, but there is a time and place for it, and there is such a thing as excess. I don't need a sign every mile of road that I'm driving on telling me, "Jesus loves you." Yes, Jesus loves me ... this I know ... for the Bible tells me so. \nThese signs from God are getting out of control. They're everywhere. In any given town, you can pull up to an intersection and see a sign on the corner that says, "God is great." Well, that's nice, but God is also blocking my view of the intersection and almost got me T-boned by a tanker truck. \n Perhaps the Department of Transportation should work with religious leaders to form a new campaign. They could sponsor signs that say things like, "God wants you to keep your eyes on the road," or "Jesus buckles his seat belt, and so should you." But until that happens, some of these signs need to go away. \n I therefore am giving myself the right to create a new commandment. The new 11th commandment is, "Thou shalt not put signs promoting one's own religion in idiotic locations that put others in danger." I think it's only fair. I am all for practicing whatever religion you so desire, but let's keep the advertisement under control. A sign here and there in a strategically reasonable and safe place is fine, but lets keep the "Got God?" signs blocking the "dangerous curves ahead" signs to a minimum. Oh, and kids ... Don't drink and drive, God wants you alive.