A day for toast

Did you know that Saturday was Flag Day? Did you know that Flag Day, a day set aside each year to honor the American flag, exists? If you're like me, Flag Day probably came and went without you noticing or doing anything in particular to honor the Stars and Stripes.\nBut Flag Day is certainly not the only holiday that regularly escapes the notice of the majority of the population. It isn't even the only obscure holiday on June 14, for Flag Day shares that day with Pop Goes the Weasel Day. Indeed, the more I looked, the more strange and unknown holidays I unearthed. There are special days set aside for plumbers and weatherpersons, drinking straws and bathtubs ... Alaska and baked Alaska. \nThere is an awe -- and perhaps hunger -- inspiring number of days dedicated to various types of food, and often delineated with stunning specificity: separate days for pudding varietals, separate days for jelly-filled doughnuts and creme-filled doughnuts and even doughnuts themselves. And I'm sure we're all grateful to have National Crab Stuffed Flounder Day, National Hot Pastrami Sandwich Day and National Grape Popsicle Day.\nWhich, of course, leaves us wondering how all the other popsicle flavors feel about being left out.\nAlthough the food-related days are self-explanatory, some of these holidays remain a complete puzzle to me. What on earth happens on Answer Your Cat's Question Day? What if it rains or snows on Neither Rain Nor Snow Day? What if there are no convenient Australians on Hug an Australian Day? \nAt first glance, the profusion of quirky holidays honoring quirky things might seem rather ridiculous. Do we really need a day set aside for toast? And what is the utility of Measure Your Feet Day?\nBut the mere fact that these odd holidays are so unknown to us shows that simply declaring a holiday doesn't force us to be aware of it. Obviously, we don't need to worry that we're wasting loads of valuable resources on elaborate celebrations for, say, Reading a Roadmap Day.\nOn the other hand, whoever creates these holidays must think there is something worth honoring and a holiday is the way to honor it. For instance, November 21 is World Hello Day, when we're supposed to greet 10 people, allegedly as an opportunity for anyone around the world to promote peace. Forgive me for being cynical, but I can't help doubting that greeting 10 people will bring us significantly closer to world peace. And if it really is so powerful, why limit it to one day? \nI imagine our pets are relieved that National Dress Up Your Pet Day only comes once a year, but do we really want to restrict neatness to National Clean Off Your Desk Day and grammar to Speak in Complete Sentences Day? Even with some of those more frivolous holidays, recognizing something on just one day seems less than wise, as if we can ignore it the other 364. For holidays recognizing genuinely worthwhile causes, such as Memorial Day or Martin Luther King Jr. Day, relegating our remembrance to a single day seems even more inadequate.\n We have a knack not only for overlooking holidays most of the year but also for distorting their intended meanings. Memorial Day and Labor Day are now largely occasions for sales and cookouts rather than honoring veterans or working people.\nConsidering how often we forget that holidays exist, forget them the rest of the year and forget their true meanings, inventing a holiday doesn't seem like the most efficacious way to advance a cause. But if declaring a strange holiday doesn't do much good, at least it doesn't do any harm. Let people celebrate whatever weird holidays they want. As for me, I'm eagerly awaiting July 7 -- Chocolate Day.