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(10/05/06 4:00am)
For those unfamiliar with the Scissor Sisters, let's make something clear: If you cannot stomach disco, you should quit reading here. In both Ta Dah and their self-titled debut, the Scissor Sisters vigorously reject disco's death -- as if they're avenging the July 12, 1979 mass-destruction of disco albums at Chicago's Comiskey Park. They aren't just influenced by disco -- they produce hyper-disco; the disco-iest disco on the market, shamelessly geared toward butt-shaking. So, if you think "disco sucks," just assume this album's an "F".\nStill here? Got a pair of platform boots from the thrift store? Busy gluing rhinestones to a jean jacket with a Bedazzler? Got Barry Gibb tied up in your basement, you say? Okay, then you'll like the Scissor Sisters -- although I'd recommend their debut over this one.\nThat advice should come as no surprise to those familiar with the first album -- after all, how could they top their dance-tastic cover of Pink Floyd's "Comfortably Numb?" And yet, while Ta Dah is a reasonably good follow-up, it falls short on other counts as well.\nFor starters, its first song is also its best. "I Don't Feel Like Dancin'" -- co-written by Elton John, and featuring the rocketman himself on piano -- is an absolute floor-burner. The hooks are deadly, the chorus irresistible -- singer Jake Shears' protests against dancin,' when combined with a beat that demands it, produces a dizzy cognitive dissonance. If wedding DJs aren't playing it someday, then I weep for the world. Unfortunately, nothing else on the album quite compares.\nThen there's the fact that while the instrumental side generally screams "party," the lyrics sometimes are surprisingly grim. Plenty of great dance music doesn't exactly beam with sunny happiness -- Gang of Four, Hot Hot Heat, Primal Scream's "XTRMNTR," etc. Yet, in aiming for edgy, the Scissor Sisters hit creepy instead -- in particular, "I Can't Decide" (chorus: "I can't decide/Whether you should live or die"), with its sadistic murder fantasies, could well be on Hannibal Lecter's iPod. This works well for The Cramps, but kind of kills the mood here.\nFinally, though, there's the simple fact that in crafting a more sophisticated sound, Ta Dah loses something of the debut's intensity. Track after track on Scissor Sisters threatened to drag you onto the dancefloor -- Ta Dah is slightly more hesitant, dithering while some bigger, better-looking disco album asks you to dance, and you two end up making hot animal love in the backseat of its car. Damn you for ruining my senior prom!\n... Er, uh, so anyway -- buy it if you like disco.
(10/05/06 4:00am)
"I've talked about a lot things ... I've covered a lot in my 20 years," says Janet, on the opening interlude, "Intro (20)." "But I want to keep things light, I want to have fun." And so begins 20 Years Old, a nod to Jackson's 20 years in the biz since her debut album "Control" came out. \nWith the first several tracks, Janet infuses the same heavy dance beats and bump-and-grind style of her Rhythm Nation days. These "me" songs consist of Janet commanding someone to do the dirty, sexy deeds she's never been afraid to talk about. There's "Show Me" and "Do it 2 Me." After hearing any of those, and the fun "So Excited," one can't help but wonder why they weren't used as the album's first single, instead of the mid-tempo "Call on Me" featuring Nelly. \nNever heard it? No surprise. It's been pretty much absent from the airwaves and was overshadowed by the likes of Fergie, Nelly Furtado and Beyoncé all summer. After her last album, Damita Jo, tanked due to the overblown Superbowl fiasco, Janet's just itching for a comeback. \nThe first several tracks are vivacious, but about halfway through, the album slows down. Instead of being the life of the party, she sounds more content to be just another guest sitting in the corner, tapping her foot with the music. Janet whispers her way through many of these songs, telling her boyfriend she'd like to escape to a private room to do some snuggling and eventually, well, you know. She sings so softly it's hard to recognize that some of the more adult lyrics are actually a bit childish. "I get sensitive when you work/It feels so good when it hurts," she sings on "Take Care." On "Enjoy," we're told to "Just enjoy the simple things/Enjoy the day life brings." That's sweet, Janet, but I'm pretty sure I've seen that embroidered on a small pillow at Hobby Lobby. Luckily, the song's execution doesn't make it sound as corny.\nFor a powerful title like "20 Years Old," and such an extensive career, it's a little disappointing that Janet favors sexuality over self-reflection. There's nothing about how it felt to be hated by half the country for two seconds of television controversy. Or what it's like to be one of music's most successful artists. Nope, the only real mention of her career is joking about her guest spot on "Good Times" back in the 70s. You've got to hand it to Janet, though. No masterpiece, but maybe there's a worthy toast to 20 years in here somewhere.
(10/05/06 4:00am)
My Morning Jacket are an amalgamation of many genres, so it's hard to pinpoint exactly what they sound like. Phish, Coldplay, Beck, Radiohead, Flaming Lips, Pink Floyd... take your pick. If you like any of the above, then you happen to be in the right place. Okonokos is a sprawling live album, almost two hours worth of sonic landscapes and jams that will make your ears bleed in a soothing way. Southern rock took some shrooms and stumbled onto stage, and this is what you hear. It's some pretty amazing stuff. \nA lot of bands that perform live vomit out a carbon copy of their studio performances. In this case, things are exactly the same to the T. My Morning Jacket puts up their middle fingers to these bands by playing old songs in a brand new fashion. If you've heard the originals, you'll be caught off guard at times, but it's this changing of the guard that makes this album almost a brand new batch of songs. \nThe album is all about feedback and reverb. The recording is solid -- very clear, very clean, but what makes it stand out from other live albums is the haunting effect that is present in the echo of the vocals. There is still a feeling of raw emotion present, but it's nice to have a live album that doesn't sound like shit. \nThese guys have been around for eight years. I've seen bands put out live albums after two full-lengths. The Jacket have enough material under their belts for a couple double-live albums, and it never gets boring. The album is very relaxing at times -- a lot of texture and atmosphere, even hints of country rock. You will get engulfed in sound, maybe even lost, as this sonic scenery progresses. \nHippie music? Stoner music? Well, not necessarily. There is enough variety on this disc to satisfy almost anyone (I say almost anyone because if you're into Justin Timberlake or anything of that caliber, perhaps you're out of luck). The jams are a lot of fun; the quieter songs are haunting and relaxing. You really don't know what to expect. If you're a fan of the band already, you'll be blown away. If you're not a fan, you might become one.
(10/05/06 4:00am)
"The Lake House" attempts to be romantic. Its lame attempt is as feeble as the concept and rules it creates surrounding time travel. Yes, theories about time travel have their inherent paradoxes, and they can often be overlooked for the sake of a movie's theme and plot, but "The Lake House" is so unnecessarily convoluted and silly that it becomes a distraction.\n"Lake House" opens with a tragic accident in Chicago, which lays bare an impending plot twist without too much audience effort. A lonely doctor named Kate (Sandra Bullock) witnesses this accident, and after taking some advice from a friend, decides she needs some time off, and returns to the lake house her ex-boyfriend bought for them two years ago. She leaves a letter in the mailbox for the new tenant, telling him about paw prints by the front door that need to be painted over. However, the person who receives her mail through the same mailbox doesn't see any paw prints, and this is because he's living in 2004, exactly two years in the past. His name is Alex (Keanu Reeves), and his renowned architect father built the house when he was a young boy. Thus we learn about the significance behind the lake house, and how the lake house's mailbox is a flux capacitor.\nKate and Alex then quickly begin to form a romantic relationship through the letters they exchange by means of the lake house mailbox. Alex hesitates to look for Kate in his time because she wouldn't know who he was and because she would, at that time, be in a relationship. However, he does find her, and they share an intimate encounter although he keeps her future a secret. Now, the easy thing would've been for Alex to mention the encounter to the future Kate, so she'd remember and look for him, but he doesn't. In fact, the characters could've done a hundred different things to make the most of their magic mailbox, but I suppose they didn't want to be too hasty, even though they quickly became involved with each other, and their letter exchanges resembled the pace and informality of an Internet chat room. It would all make your head spin, were it not so easily dismissed.\nFollowing several ups and downs, Alex and Kate's relationship comes full circle at the end of the film, and Kate finds herself at a race against time to save the relationship she has with Alex. Unfortunately, the predictability of the ending made it lack intensity, and in the tradition of mainstream Hollywood cinema, it took no risks. There was no passion in any of the film at all, really, opting instead on catching Kate sulking while Alex fails to plan his actions with any thought or care.\n"The Lake House" is a remake of a Korean film named "Il Mare" which, like most remakes, is probably much better than its American successor. It also adopts themes about waiting and patience from the novel "Persuasion" by Jane Austen. The DVD doesn't have many extras except a theatrical trailer and some outtakes and deleted scenes. I'd skip on this one and rent the Korean version instead. Perhaps "The Lake House" would have worked better if it were a romantic comedy directed by the Farrelly Brothers, but that's not saying much.
(10/05/06 4:00am)
Curious George is a good little monkey, but sometimes, he forgets. And sadly, it looks as though the creators of the "Curious George" DVD also forgot something important, at least to me. They forgot to include a director's commentary.\nNow I understand that its a kid's movie, and kids do not care about director commontaries. But I also know that I used to have a stuffed Curious George. Although I am not sure the current whereabouts of my stuffed friend, I am intrigued by how they turned a classic character into a fun and entertaining movie.\nAnd really, just because the kids might not be interested is no excuse to skimp on commentary.\nEspecially when I bring up my other complaint about the DVD: advertisements. Pop in the DVD and a browser window opens to the Curious George Movie page. True, there are fun games to play, but leave your stinkin' paws off my browser -- oh, wrong monkey movie. I finally get to the root menu of the DVD and click on extras -- only to find a Volkswagen commercial and an ad for Shea Homes -- because they care about the kids, right?\nBeyond those complaints, it is a good DVD. There are a number of games and activities -- I learned some new words, got to paint and learned how to draw George. My drawing almost looked like it might possibly be similar to a drawing of the cute little monkey.\nThere are a few shorter interviews on the DVD that discuss various aspects of the movie, the most interesting of which happens to be the one sponsored by Volkswagen in which they explain the use of rounded edges and bright colors. For the overhead street scenes, when George is playing in the back of the truck, not only is the truck "monkey-friendly," meaning no sharp edges, but the truck is red so that it will stand out from the other vehicles. It sounds like an educational psychologist was asked how children maintain focus, so two thumbs up for the attention to detail.\nThe variety of games will bring me back to play them again, especially the "Where is George?" game because I still can not figure out where the little monkey is hiding.\nTwo thumbs up for the movie, I made sure to see it on opening night and enjoyed it enough to buy the DVD.\nThe DVD is successful, but of course it could be better. The kid in me is satisfied with the number of activities, but the academic in me always wants to know more.
(10/05/06 4:00am)
"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within." Yeah, I wrote that. Sounds deep, huh? Ok, I didn't really write it. I got it off some crappy Web site, but as current film and television trends suggest, as a twenty-something, I would be easily capable of ripping that quote down and taking shameless credit for it.\nLast week I went to see "The Last Kiss." Zach Braff plays a guy who has a quarter-life crisis and seeks one last fling with college co-ed Rachel Bilson. Upon their first meeting, Bilson spews the prophetic words, "The world is moving so fast now that we start freaking long before our parents did because we don't ever stop to breathe anymore," and then places her hand on Braff's heart. Umm... whatever happened to "Hi, my name is Kim, nice to meet you?" Nope, these days we must waste no time with conventional conversation. The world is moving too fast.\nAfter the movie, "Grey's Anatomy" was on, where resident voice of God, Meredith Grey, is always on hand overcoming obstacles and issues. She may not have the answer to all of life's problems, but give her a cool indie rock song to speak over, and she'll provide hope in the form of the almighty voice-over. Then, on "Six Degrees" it was Jay Hernandez's turn to inform us of the magic of New York -- where anything and everything can happen, and everyone is thrilled to be living life to the fullest. Within seconds, Erika Christensen hopped on a speeding street cleaner, threw off her clothes, and screamed into the wind, because hey, ain't life grand? To top it all off, "Garden State" was showing on a movie channel.\nWhat the hell? Why do these people get to live such deep, meaningful lives, while I'm stuck here watching Borat in my pajamas? This was going to change. From that moment, no word would leave my mouth that would not be worthy of a Grey's voice-over. No moment would be wasted lying around doing nothing. There would always be some cool song playing in the background wherever I should venture. I would spew more feeling than a 14-year-old emo kid, blogging away on MySpace after a Jack's Mannequin concert. I have the capability to do so. After all, Rachel Bilson's character was a college sophomore (Hey, me too!) at a Big Ten school (Hey, me too!), who enjoys stalking fathers to be (Hey, me -- er -- scratch that one.)\nI already knew the key components of my quest: Deep voice-overs, cool music (Thanks, Cameron Crowe), aimless walks while looking depressed, lots of rain and eventually, a climb atop some sort of hill after I overcome my barriers, only to scream at the top of my lungs. But there was one thing I was missing: A female companion to make the journey that much more meaningful.\nSitting in my political theory class, I looked at the girl sitting next to me. She was cute and even had a trendy Natalie Portman-ish haircut (not "V for Vendetta style," I'll leave turning into a political revolutionist for next week). This was my chance. While my professor rambled on about Aristotle, I leaned over to her and whispered, "Don't you just feel like they're always teaching us the wrong thing? I mean, yeah, this stuff is interesting, but shouldn't they be teaching us how to laugh, learn, cry and above all things -- how to love?" She looked at me strangely, then buried herself back into her notes. Looks like this would be a solo mission.\nNext, it was time for the slow walk. To a viewer, I would look nearly frozen while everything behind me flew by. To help with the background music, I turned to the shuffle function on my iPod. The first song that came up was "Fun, Fun, Fun" by the Beach Boys. I tried again only to get Smoky Robinson's "Merry Christmas Baby." Future attempts were just as dismal until Green Day's "Time of Your Life" came up. An obvious choice, albeit, cliché, but it'd have to do. As I walked, I realized the trip back to my place took 15-minutes. In 15-minutes, I could cover several plot points. What I needed was a three-minute montage of photos of me and my friends striking funny poses, close-ups of us laughing, and then some sort of freeze-frame with us lying all together. Instead, the next best thing came: the bus. Not only would taking the bus back let me be lazy, but I'd be able to put my head against the window and stare insightfully.\nThroughout the week, I tried to think deep thoughts, but nothing ever came. A road trip would allow me to roll down the window and sing at the top of my lungs, but it was the middle of the week, and missing class was not an option. After all, if in five years I'm going to question where I am, I need the education to get stuck in the dead-end job I hate. Looks like I'll never get to know what it truly means to be a trendsetting, emotion-pouring, fun-loving, problem-solving youth.\nAfter spending hours at the library, I emerged at 2 a.m. only to find it was raining. I put my iPod on, and the song "I Like it," started. "Gonna ride this merry-go-round/ And dance like the night is never ending/ Gonna get so high on life/ You won't be able to bring me down," Natalie Maines belted. This was it, standing in the pouring rain: my life-affirming moment. And then it came to me. It's not worth trying to be something you're not. TV characters are deep because writers get paid to make them that way. If we're always trying to strive for something better than what we have, we'll never appreciate the small things. TV is an escape, and a good one at that, yet we shouldn't try to constantly escape. We'd be escaping from the only thing that's real in our lives. \nHey, wait a minute, that sounded like a voice-over. Mission accomplished!
(10/05/06 4:00am)
This little town amid the cornfields wasn't always a hub for world music. It was made that way by three men who wanted to manifest the spirit and folk tradition that embody the crossroads of America. \nThere were three men in the Bloomington music community that met to discuss the creation of such a music festival, which would bring music of every culture to the town, back in 1996. Three and a half months later, the they had assembled 14 acts from around the world representing what they felt were the best and brightest stars in global music. Only one task remained: Naming the festival.\nLee Williams, a former disco-age DJ, became one of the festival's cofounders and is now its director. He described the naming task as twofold. \n"We wanted to have it in some way be representative of south central Indiana music, but we also wanted it to tie in to the outside world," he says.\nHowever, this crucial task was soon completed when one of the members of the naming committee suggested a double entendre of sorts that incorporated an international symbol of peace, with an Indiana folk music legend.\nThey would call it "Lotus Fest."\nNot just a flower
(10/05/06 4:00am)
Joshua Gold began forging notes to get out of school in the fourth grade. He was that guy in your X201 class who rolled into lecture once in a blue moon and called you 10 minutes before a group meeting to say he couldn't come, regrettably ("I've just been really, really sick the past semester or so"). On the eve of I-Core, he dropped out of the Kelley School of Business because, let's face it, who really has the time or energy to study while in college?\nHis resume: lifeguard, pool hand (inspired by a suggestive "Desperate Housewives" episode) and full-time New Jersey Shore beach bum (an occupation he chose during the summer he "didn't feel like working").\nOh, and owner, manager and salad preparation artist of Bloomington's novel eatery, Mixed Greens.\nThe restaurant, which opened in June 2005, serves an array of salads, wraps, smoothies and other health foods. It offers a breakfast menu and an assortment of Splenda-fied treats for those who want to indulge without the extra calories. Since opening, the restaurant has drawn health conscious students, locals and business people to its hip 10th Street and College Avenue location. It's open seven days a week, has a delivery service and on average pulls a couple hundred orders a day.\nNeedless to say, Gold is seeing the green in more places than his salad bar. \nAlthough Mixed Greens is a niche all its own, Gold is just one of the student entrepreneurs in Bloomington. Baked!, Straight2YourDoor.com and Btownmenus.com and Proof Magazine are other businesses run by ambitious students who have sacrificed their free time, social life, and school work to put all of their energy into these enterprises. \nGold, 21, would be a senior were he currently enrolled in any classes at IU. He had aspirations of starting his own restaurant for years and a heart that just wasn't in school. Growing up, his prodigious independence and natural ability as a businessman opened doors for him to make a quick dollar, selling anything from baseball cards to pool supplies. After making a stop at the Mixed Greens in his Morganville, N.J., hometown to curb a case of the munchies two summers ago, he knew it was the one he'd want to mirror his business after. \n"I was hungry and asked my mom if there was anything new in town," he says. "She told me about this place, Mixed Greens. The second I went there, I told the owner I wanted to franchise it because I knew it was the one that would work in Bloomington."\nFrom the beginning, Gold has run a one-man show. While the New Jersey Mixed Greens was his inspiration, Gold didn't just want to copy it: He wanted to expand it, make it bigger and better. He revamped the basic business plans that were handed to him and began negotiating leases with building owners in Bloomington the instant he had the basic logistics figured out. \nWith a loan from his parents (that he affirms he will be able to pay back within the next two years), he started construction for Mixed Greens last year. After getting all his ducks in a row, including picking out paint and primer and working with advertisers and researching prices, his restaurant was ready for the public. However inspiring his story may be, it wasn't an easy ride. Despite experiencing rejection from local landlords and being cast aside as an untrustworthy and inexperienced kid, he finally bought the location he's at now. \nGold reports multiple headaches. He paid twice as much as he should have for the space he owns and hears endless empty promises from different people with whom he works. He missed his spring break. He stayed in Bloomington all summer instead of going home, logging about 80 hours a week. At home he faces the mountains of paperwork he is finally whittling down now that the restaurant has been running smoothly for a few months. Other student entrepreneurs, such as Straight2yourdoor.com's Jason Moldoff, have experienced similar sacrifices. \nMoldoff, an IU alumnus, has been running the food delivery service since last year, and he says his personal sacrifices are extensive. Playing basketball, going to the gym, watching TV and frequenting Bloomington's restaurants for dinner were nothing more than happy memories. His amount of sleep and grade point average declined, and hardships with his girlfriend became the norm. \nMoldoff and student Seth Fishman modeled Straight2yourdoor.com after national companies like Takeout Taxi. Their Web site serves as the liaison between the customer and restaurants that don't traditionally deliver. With Fishman's recent resignation from the business, he is running Straight2yourdoor by himself. \n"Personally, if I found the right person I'd prefer to have a partner," he says. "But if you don't have someone as dedicated as you, it's much better to work alone." \nThere are certainly benefits to working alone. Gold says that the profit he would normally have to cut to a partner go to luxuries like flat screen TVs for the restaurant and top of the line kitchen appliances. \n"It's difficult to run a business and be a student," he says. "You'll never be able to completely run and nurture it while doing both, but you can sustain it and grow it slowly."\nWhile they are two \nseperate entities, Straight2yourdoor.com\nis teaming up with Btownmenus.com in an effort that will help both businesses.\nBtownmenus.com, created by juniors Peter Margulies and Michael Rolland, was what happened when the two friends were sick of ordering from the same places. Motivated by frustration with the lack of options and the opportunity to start something new, the pair made a phone call to a friend at Penn State who was involved in a Web site on which students could view restaurant menus and place online orders for. \n"We knew of this Web site where students could go look at menus from restaurants all over town, see what was open or closed, and then place their order online," Margulies says. "We decided that we wanted to do the same kind of thing and started talking to restaurants around town into being a part of our site." \nA year later, Margulies and Rolland are running a successful business and telling their stories to classes as guest lecturers all over campus.\nThe majority of their time is spent wheeling and dealing with the some 60 restaurants they feature on their Web site. When other students are sleeping soundly until class, Margulies says he is up every day running around town visiting clients, building and maintaining a good reputation, and as always, trying to find ways to expand. \nGaining experience is the common denominator in all of these student-run businesses. While some of these entrepreneurs might have visions of expanding their businesses or leaving them all together when a better offer arises, they have made a name for themselves by pursuing a dream and working to make it happen.\nAnd when other college students and twentysomethings are worrying about where to party or how to balance time between working out and studying, these young businessmen's concerns are keeping the wings they are delivering to clients hot, that perpetual leak in the restaurant bathroom and building a reputation among students, locals and clients. \n"I don't mind the lack of sleep," says Gold, who considers four hours of sleep average. "What sucks the most is sometimes when I get up and turn the shower on, I'm so exhausted that I pass out again, and by the time I wake up the shower has been running for two hours and there's no hot water left."\nBut when he cashes his paycheck on Friday and can add "restaurant owner" to the list of jobs and activities on his resume, a cold shower is not a bad price to pay.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
It's hard to believe that four years have passed since the "Jackass" boys last graced movie screens with their outlandish stunts, but the boys are back, finally, with a new stable of even grosser, cruder and more death-defying gags to please their core audience. \nSince the boys' last appearance in theatres, Johnny Knoxville has fostered a modest movie career, Bam Margera made "Viva la Bam" his own and Steve-O and Chris Pontius lorded over the circus that was "WildBoyz." Neither of those shows held a candle to "Jackass," and their new movie "Jackass: Number Two" makes fans long for the glory days of the MTV series.\nA cautionary note should be afforded to those with a weak stomach because if you thought the first "Jackass" movie was nauseating at times, you're probably unprepared for the onslaught of vomit, blood, feces and horse semen in this second installment. From the first scene, involving Pontius' penis and a hungry snake, to the last skit, featuring Ehren McGhehey as a terrorist with a beard made of pubic hair, this movie must have gotten an R-rating by the skin of its teeth.\nEvery cast member takes his fair share of punishment during the course of the film, but the majority is doled out to Margera. Always the merry prankster in the first film, Bam ends up in tears not once but three times in "Number Two," and by the end credits, he pleads for there not to be a third installment. Also taking some serious punishment are Dave England and McGhehey, with the latter enduring the most intense mental gag this crew has ever pulled off. Steve-O is his usual masochistic self, squaring off with a fish hook, a beer bong, a leech and Preston Lacey's flatulence with equal abandon.\nAn obvious difference this time around is that all the primary cast members are rather well-off financially. Since 2002, most of the cast members have become millionaires, yet they're still willing to put their lives on the line for the good of the franchise. Knoxville, the richest of the bunch, comes out of the gate here as the most enthusiastic, making himself the gracious victim of an anti-personnel mine while England has an anxiety attack after watching a demonstration of the device. The only scene in the movie that falls flat is the grand finale, an homage to Hollywood musicals complete with the movie's most benign stunts.\nMost "Jackass" fans will know what to expect from "Number Two," but the intensity of much of the material here might still be surprising. If this is the last project the boys undertake together, it'll be an impressive send-off. If they choose to make a trilogy, somebody's bound to die during the filming.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
Kanye West's first graduating class of protégés is exceeding expectations this summer. Rhymefest's Blue Collar hit stores with little anticipation in July but was highly praised by critics. Lupe Fiasco's debut album, Food & Liquor, spent the better part of 2006 having its release delayed by Internet leaks and record company disputes. In fact, anybody with BitTorrent and a general interest in hip--hop probably had half the album in May.\nFiasco's career is under intense scrutiny, and it is no wonder. His first major platform was a show-stopping verse in Kanye's "Touch the Sky." Here, he demonstrated his lyrical prowess with smooth flows and creative subject matter -- I believe he's the only artist in history to reference "Lupin III." In recent months, he has advertised himself as the emcee version of Pharrell Williams with his first single, the hip--hop-skater jam "Kick, Push."\nA Chicago native, Fiasco fits the mold of an underground emcee by spilling his soul with each word and pushing the English language to its limit in the process. He has a genuine love for music, and as a practicing Muslim, he takes a serious stance on social injustices and global affairs. "Just Might Be Ok" is one of Fiasco's most lyrically impressive tracks, allowing him to show listeners where he comes from ethically, with lyrics like, "I'm cool, I don't foretell best/I ain't nicest emcee, I ain't Cornel West/I am Cornel West side, Chi-town Rivera/Malcolm X-ercise the demons, gangsta leanin'."\nHe gets much more specific, delving into current issues with "American Terrorist." He weighs in on American-Arab and Christian-Muslim relations with striking eloquence. It will be interesting to see whether Fiasco will be able to successfully continue injecting his underground style into mainstream rap from album to album, as Kanye West has done.\nGood emcees don't just flow; they also realize the synergistic force that original beats and proper samples compel on hip-hop music. As it turns out, Fiasco got a couple of good DJs to spin behind him. Jay-Z, Kanye, Pharrell and former Da Pak member Soundtrakk were responsible for the album's production, and it goes to show that you get what you pay for. "Daydreamin'" samples I Monster's "Daydream in Blue" (which is largely a sample of another song, "Daydream") with absolute compatibility. "Daydream" has found its way into a number of songs through sampling, most notably "Squares" by the Beta Band, but it is truly the precise puzzle piece on this record.\nThere is a moment on Food & Liquor in which Fiasco's voice is drowned out by the talent around him. The burgeoning single "I Gotcha," produced by the Neptunes, samples an experimental harpsichord-esque melody that gives the song an identity crisis, only to fall flat on its face. It's apparent that Fiasco is never meant to be the showcased artist on this track.\nOverall, Fiasco manages to keep his "A Bathing Ape meets Louis Farrakhan"--style on center stage. Debut albums are the touchstone from which we judge musicians, and they almost invariably remain definitive works throughout an artist's career. Fiasco's career will always depend upon how well he can collaborate with his contemporaries - he shows on this record that he can keep up with the best in the game.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
He's a little goofy, perhaps even a little neurotic, but that's precisely what we've come to love about Ben Kweller since his 2002 full-length debut, Sha Sha.\nAnd with his new self-titled effort, we're treated to plenty of that, but also Kweller at his best musically -- an eclectic blend of piano and acoustic guitar -- a sound a bit absent from his harder, more in your face disc -- 2004's On My Way.\nThe single "Sundress" plays like a building leveled by dynamite, starting out as a slow piano piece that all comes crashing to the ground in an insanely melodic and striking chorus, with piano notes and guitar strums as the bricks in a rather beautiful pile of rubble.\nThe album's lead track "Run" literally runs along - from the song's opening piano lick to Kweller's "Whoa ohs" and "Oh yeahs" that intermix with his prose about leaving a small town with his girl. Perhaps this is a song penned for his wife, Liz, who gave birth to their first child at the end of May.\n"Penny on the Train Track" is the most lyrically striking song on the disc. "I'm just a penny on the train track/Waitin' for my judgment day/Come on baby girl let me see those legs/Before I get flattened away" BK sings.\nKweller harkens back to On My Way's harder cuts with the album's concluding track "This is War." With an English accent, this song could easily be mistaken for a Bloc Party or Arctic Monkeys song, as it rolls along at a blistering pace.\nKweller's latest effort isn't quite as spot-on as Sha Sha, but it's certainly a step back in the right direction musically from On My Way. \nOn the disc's most poignant song "Until I Die," Kweller sings, "I'm so sorry/I'm so paranoid/It's something in my head/That I can't avoid."\nIt's OK, Ben -- no need for apologies. We feel you.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
Beyond all others, two words apply best in describing Kasabian's Empire. These words aren't original, or witty, or bold -- but they are nonetheless true. And, ultimately, this reviewer can only call 'em as he sees 'em. So, what are these two words? "Sophomore slump."\nLike a lot of British (and some American) indie-mainstream crossover bands of the noughties, Kasabian's self-titled debut album became a hit through heavily mining a much-loved earlier period of music. In Kasabian's case, this was the late 80's/early 90's "Madchester" scene. For those unfamiliar with Madchester, it was a musical movement based in Manchester, England that was characterized by a fusion of more straightforward rock/pop with the electronic dance beats and sampling of techno -- it also had a strongly psychedelic bend, influenced, as it was, by rave culture and the ingesting of loads and loads of ecstasy. Besides producing some great music, Madchester also turned out to be highly influential, laying the groundwork for the 90's Britpop explosion (which, in turn, influenced many of our modern bands). \nThus, a decade later, Kasabian decided to dust off the movement's sound and give it another spin, their own work borrowing liberally from Madchester's greatest bands -- The Stone Roses, Happy Mondays and "Screamadelica"/"XTRMNTR"-era Primal Scream. The result wasn't terribly original or consistent, but it had enough good tunes to more than balance out the duff ones -- including the absolutely killer single, "Club Foot." Platinum sales and world tours followed, including a stint opening for the Rolling Stones.\nSo, what to do next? Unfortunately, Empire reveals that, like Wile E. Coyote in a minefield, Kasabian has managed to stumble into just about every standard trap that bedevils those bands who strike it big with album number-one. For starters, fearing, perhaps, that they would be forever known as the "Stone Mondays," \nKasabian has ventured further into the 90's for influences -- namely The Chemical Brothers and, to a lesser extent, Oasis. Given the vocal effects, big beats and production tidbits employed, the middle of Empire (from "Sun Rise Light Flies" to "Seek & Destroy") could well have been outtakes from the Chemicals' 1999 album Surrender. Meanwhile, Kasabian's least-successful attempt at branching-out, the acoustic "British Legion," demonstrates that the band doesn't have a Noel Gallagher on staff (at least, a Gallagher at his "Morning Glory" peak). At the same time, some songs are decidedly half-baked -- such as "Shoot The Runner," which is little more than a stomping "c'mon everyone, clap along" beat, the repetition of eye-rollingly banal lyrics and a guitar solo. And many others, such as "Stuntman," are indulgently overproduced, the result of a band going hogwild with the galaxy of effects that a big recording budget can buy.\nWorst of all, while this album has some good songs (particularly the title-song), none grab the listener with the same force as those on their debut. In this sense, Empire is less Augustan Rome and more pre-World War I Austro-Hungary.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
Ever since the last hilarious scene in the movie "Mallrats" where Jason Lee takes over "The Tonight Show," I've thought, "Man, that guy really should have his own show." \nNow he does. I typically don't enjoy hick-based jokes, and "My Name is Earl" isn't the format I would've expected Lee to be in -- but it works. Lee still has that impeccable timing and as a big fan of karma, it's nice to see it appreciated and passed on here. \nThe show opens with Earl talking about how whenever something good happens to him, something bad is sure to follow. He attributes it to karma, and after getting hit by a car with a winning lottery ticket in hand, he decides to turn his life around. He makes a list of all his wrong doings and tries to correct them. \nIt's a dense, embarrassing list of wrong doings. Earl has stolen a car from a one-legged woman and cut off a piece of his dad's hair and glued it above his lip to give him a Hitler mustache before a dinner party. A lot of the humor comes from showing the ridiculous crimes and grievances Earl has doled out on the community over the years. \nA strong supporting cast rounds out the show nicely. Jaime Pressly ("Not Another Teen Movie") plays Earl's ex-wife who he tries to right many of his wrongs for. Earl's partner-in-crime and roommate is the always entertaining Ethan Suplee who plays his brother. You know him as the fat guy from "Boy Meets World" and Lee's co-star in "Mallrats" -- the one who can't find the sailboat. They live together and sleep in the same bed. \nEven while trying to make reparations, Earl makes mistakes. He sleeps with his ex-wife who is now married to his good friend. Earl tells his friend, an African American, it's not that big a deal because the friend slept with Pressly when Earl was married to her (resulting in Pressly having one black and one white baby.)\nPressly excuses the behavior saying, "You think Bruce and Demi don't sleep together and don't tell Ashton? Pff Please." \nThere's some good music in the series. Standouts for me were Bob Marley, Nick Drake and Bachman Turner Overdrive, but there are some lame songs that fill up the soundtrack as well. \nSpecial features are solid in breadth -- a blooper reel, deleted scenes, behind the scenes and a few audio commentaries. The behind the scenes feature is interesting and tells how the show is tightly based on the life of its creator. The blooper real is fairly funny, but neither feature is worth watching more than once. \nAll in all, the show has its moments and is like a comic warming up the crowd for the far superior comedy following it. I'll watch it, but I'll usually just be waiting for it to end so I can hang out with Dwight, Pam, and Jim in "The Office"
(09/28/06 4:00am)
Though I love to sing, my years of classical voice training have foiled all my previous attempts at karaoke. My operatic soprano seems ill-suited for popular karaoke numbers like "Respect" and "Proud Mary." Add to that a nasty streak of stage fright from my childhood, and I tend to avoid the karaoke stage altogether, unless I'm in the company of a large group of drunken friends. \nBut I was determined to change that as I headed out to the Bluebird on Monday night. Inspired by the stage-diving rockers on Rockstar: Supernova, I was ready for my turn in the spotlight. \nKaraoke at the Bluebird seemed decidedly more casual than at other karaoke bars I'd been to. The event's starting time was more of a suggestion than a hard-and-fast rule. It was already past 10:30 p.m., and the staff at the Bluebird was still setting up the equipment as the first hopeful performers began to arrive. The singers clustered around small round tables in the bar's back room and studied the songbooks, carefully choosing the night's selections. Pieces of their conversation drifted past the table at which I was seated. \n"I wrote down Maroon 5, but now I can't remember what song of their's I wanted to do," bemoaned an already tipsy woman. \nAnd... \n"Why are you signing me up for the Hokey Pokey?"\nWhile waiting for the performances to begin, I took in the atmosphere of the club. The back room was dark and cavernous, and the stage, empty at this point except for equipment, seemed huge. Harsh white lights trained down on three microphone stands placed at center stage. Full-size black and white portraits of famous performers like "The Coug" stared at me from the walls. I hoped he wouldn't pass judgment on me. \nMichael, this week's host at the Bluebird, was a tall, talkative man dressed in a bright yellow sweater. From his perch on the stage, he and the karaoke night regulars maintained a running dialogue liberally spiced with profanity. \nThe first performer, a young woman with wavy brown hair that reached down her back, took on the Janis Joplin classic "Mercedes Benz." She sang all the right notes, but her voice lacked that certain grit and soul characteristic of the iconic rocker. I made a note to myself not to try to imitate any legendary performers. During the second performance of the night, a rendition of the country hit "It Wasn't God Who Made Honky Tonk Angels," a group of girls in formal dresses sashayed into the back room. As they tottered around on their high heels, it was clear that they'd already been to at least one bar that evening. The group's leader -- and, the bar soon found out, the birthday girl -- wore a tiara and carried a wand. Laughing and singing, the girls made their way to a table directly in front of the stage. They put on almost as much of a show as the singer.\nOver the next few performances, the birthday girls got the real party started -- cheering, dancing, screaming, even throwing bras on stage. (Judging from the enormity of the bras, I don't think the party girls were their original wearers.) Things got even wilder when the birthday girl herself came on stage to sing "Lady Marmalade." Michael put one of the bras on over his yellow sweater and danced with the birthday girl as she belted it out Patti LaBelle-style. The spectacle was mesmerizing. I was relieved I didn't have to go next. \nBut the next performers managed to hold their own. Apparently inspired by the appearance of the bras, a skinny young man with wire-frame glasses stripped off his t-shirt to sing "Never Tear Us Apart," an '80s power ballad by INXS. Michael, still wearing the bra, joined him on stage, and the two of them performed some sort of interpretive dance. Judging by the audience response, it was a hit. \nAs I watched more performances, my determination to sing grew until it finally outweighed my anxiety. Summoning up my courage, I walked to the stage and picked up a songbook and song request slip. "Think Karaoke for Fun," read the book's cover. Fun or not, I was going to do it. I quickly found the page I was looking for, wrote down a song title and number, and took my slip to the stage. The next performance, however, made me wish I hadn't. Building on the success of "Never Tear Us Apart," the duet partners returned to the stage with the AC/DC hit "You Shook Me All Night Long." The Bluebird itself was shaking as the entire bar sang along. Bras went flying again. How could I live up to that, I wondered. I sat through the next several performances with my adrenaline pumping as I waited to hear my name called. I really had to go to the bathroom, but I was afraid I'd miss my turn if I left. \nIt was after midnight, and the bar was filling up -- more people to hear me sing. But it was too late to back out now. I was committed. If the rockers of Rockstar: Supernova could do it, so could I. \nWhen Michael finally called my name, I took a deep breath and went up the stairs to the stage. As I squinted in the harsh glare from the stage lights, the microphone in my hands, my heart thudded in my chest. What had I gotten myself into?\nThe opening notes of Evanescence's "Bring Me to Life" jolted me back to reality. And without another thought, I opened my mouth and began to sing.
(09/28/06 4:00am)
It's here, it's finally here: TV premiere week! Sure this summer had "Entourage" and Tim Gunn's stroke victim--like squeals of "make it work" to hold us over, but there's no better feeling than rejoining old friends and making new ones. My poor TiVo, I'm not sure if she'll be able to handle the overload of recording her master has thrust upon her. But how else to decide which new shows to get addicted to and which to cancel? Fortunately for you, I'm here to clue you in.
(09/28/06 3:18am)
It's here, it's finally here: TV premiere week! Sure this summer had "Entourage" and Tim Gunn's stroke victim--like squeals of "make it work" to hold us over, but there's no better feeling than rejoining old friends and making new ones. My poor TiVo, I'm not sure if she'll be able to handle the overload of recording her master has thrust upon her. But how else to decide which new shows to get addicted to and which to cancel? Fortunately for you, I'm here to clue you in.
(09/28/06 3:12am)
Though I love to sing, my years of classical voice training have foiled all my previous attempts at karaoke. My operatic soprano seems ill-suited for popular karaoke numbers like "Respect" and "Proud Mary." Add to that a nasty streak of stage fright from my childhood, and I tend to avoid the karaoke stage altogether, unless I'm in the company of a large group of drunken friends. \nBut I was determined to change that as I headed out to the Bluebird on Monday night. Inspired by the stage-diving rockers on Rockstar: Supernova, I was ready for my turn in the spotlight. \nKaraoke at the Bluebird seemed decidedly more casual than at other karaoke bars I'd been to. The event's starting time was more of a suggestion than a hard-and-fast rule. It was already past 10:30 p.m., and the staff at the Bluebird was still setting up the equipment as the first hopeful performers began to arrive. The singers clustered around small round tables in the bar's back room and studied the songbooks, carefully choosing the night's selections. Pieces of their conversation drifted past the table at which I was seated. \n"I wrote down Maroon 5, but now I can't remember what song of their's I wanted to do," bemoaned an already tipsy woman. \nAnd... \n"Why are you signing me up for the Hokey Pokey?"\nWhile waiting for the performances to begin, I took in the atmosphere of the club. The back room was dark and cavernous, and the stage, empty at this point except for equipment, seemed huge. Harsh white lights trained down on three microphone stands placed at center stage. Full-size black and white portraits of famous performers like "The Coug" stared at me from the walls. I hoped he wouldn't pass judgment on me. \nMichael, this week's host at the Bluebird, was a tall, talkative man dressed in a bright yellow sweater. From his perch on the stage, he and the karaoke night regulars maintained a running dialogue liberally spiced with profanity. \nThe first performer, a young woman with wavy brown hair that reached down her back, took on the Janis Joplin classic "Mercedes Benz." She sang all the right notes, but her voice lacked that certain grit and soul characteristic of the iconic rocker. I made a note to myself not to try to imitate any legendary performers. During the second performance of the night, a rendition of the country hit "It Wasn't God Who Made Honky Tonk Angels," a group of girls in formal dresses sashayed into the back room. As they tottered around on their high heels, it was clear that they'd already been to at least one bar that evening. The group's leader -- and, the bar soon found out, the birthday girl -- wore a tiara and carried a wand. Laughing and singing, the girls made their way to a table directly in front of the stage. They put on almost as much of a show as the singer.\nOver the next few performances, the birthday girls got the real party started -- cheering, dancing, screaming, even throwing bras on stage. (Judging from the enormity of the bras, I don't think the party girls were their original wearers.) Things got even wilder when the birthday girl herself came on stage to sing "Lady Marmalade." Michael put one of the bras on over his yellow sweater and danced with the birthday girl as she belted it out Patti LaBelle-style. The spectacle was mesmerizing. I was relieved I didn't have to go next. \nBut the next performers managed to hold their own. Apparently inspired by the appearance of the bras, a skinny young man with wire-frame glasses stripped off his t-shirt to sing "Never Tear Us Apart," an '80s power ballad by INXS. Michael, still wearing the bra, joined him on stage, and the two of them performed some sort of interpretive dance. Judging by the audience response, it was a hit. \nAs I watched more performances, my determination to sing grew until it finally outweighed my anxiety. Summoning up my courage, I walked to the stage and picked up a songbook and song request slip. "Think Karaoke for Fun," read the book's cover. Fun or not, I was going to do it. I quickly found the page I was looking for, wrote down a song title and number, and took my slip to the stage. The next performance, however, made me wish I hadn't. Building on the success of "Never Tear Us Apart," the duet partners returned to the stage with the AC/DC hit "You Shook Me All Night Long." The Bluebird itself was shaking as the entire bar sang along. Bras went flying again. How could I live up to that, I wondered. I sat through the next several performances with my adrenaline pumping as I waited to hear my name called. I really had to go to the bathroom, but I was afraid I'd miss my turn if I left. \nIt was after midnight, and the bar was filling up -- more people to hear me sing. But it was too late to back out now. I was committed. If the rockers of Rockstar: Supernova could do it, so could I. \nWhen Michael finally called my name, I took a deep breath and went up the stairs to the stage. As I squinted in the harsh glare from the stage lights, the microphone in my hands, my heart thudded in my chest. What had I gotten myself into?\nThe opening notes of Evanescence's "Bring Me to Life" jolted me back to reality. And without another thought, I opened my mouth and began to sing.
(09/28/06 3:01am)
Ever since the last hilarious scene in the movie "Mallrats" where Jason Lee takes over "The Tonight Show," I've thought, "Man, that guy really should have his own show." \nNow he does. I typically don't enjoy hick-based jokes, and "My Name is Earl" isn't the format I would've expected Lee to be in -- but it works. Lee still has that impeccable timing and as a big fan of karma, it's nice to see it appreciated and passed on here. \nThe show opens with Earl talking about how whenever something good happens to him, something bad is sure to follow. He attributes it to karma, and after getting hit by a car with a winning lottery ticket in hand, he decides to turn his life around. He makes a list of all his wrong doings and tries to correct them. \nIt's a dense, embarrassing list of wrong doings. Earl has stolen a car from a one-legged woman and cut off a piece of his dad's hair and glued it above his lip to give him a Hitler mustache before a dinner party. A lot of the humor comes from showing the ridiculous crimes and grievances Earl has doled out on the community over the years. \nA strong supporting cast rounds out the show nicely. Jaime Pressly ("Not Another Teen Movie") plays Earl's ex-wife who he tries to right many of his wrongs for. Earl's partner-in-crime and roommate is the always entertaining Ethan Suplee who plays his brother. You know him as the fat guy from "Boy Meets World" and Lee's co-star in "Mallrats" -- the one who can't find the sailboat. They live together and sleep in the same bed. \nEven while trying to make reparations, Earl makes mistakes. He sleeps with his ex-wife who is now married to his good friend. Earl tells his friend, an African American, it's not that big a deal because the friend slept with Pressly when Earl was married to her (resulting in Pressly having one black and one white baby.)\nPressly excuses the behavior saying, "You think Bruce and Demi don't sleep together and don't tell Ashton? Pff Please." \nThere's some good music in the series. Standouts for me were Bob Marley, Nick Drake and Bachman Turner Overdrive, but there are some lame songs that fill up the soundtrack as well. \nSpecial features are solid in breadth -- a blooper reel, deleted scenes, behind the scenes and a few audio commentaries. The behind the scenes feature is interesting and tells how the show is tightly based on the life of its creator. The blooper real is fairly funny, but neither feature is worth watching more than once. \nAll in all, the show has its moments and is like a comic warming up the crowd for the far superior comedy following it. I'll watch it, but I'll usually just be waiting for it to end so I can hang out with Dwight, Pam, and Jim in "The Office"
(09/28/06 2:56am)
Beyond all others, two words apply best in describing Kasabian's Empire. These words aren't original, or witty, or bold -- but they are nonetheless true. And, ultimately, this reviewer can only call 'em as he sees 'em. So, what are these two words? "Sophomore slump."\nLike a lot of British (and some American) indie-mainstream crossover bands of the noughties, Kasabian's self-titled debut album became a hit through heavily mining a much-loved earlier period of music. In Kasabian's case, this was the late 80's/early 90's "Madchester" scene. For those unfamiliar with Madchester, it was a musical movement based in Manchester, England that was characterized by a fusion of more straightforward rock/pop with the electronic dance beats and sampling of techno -- it also had a strongly psychedelic bend, influenced, as it was, by rave culture and the ingesting of loads and loads of ecstasy. Besides producing some great music, Madchester also turned out to be highly influential, laying the groundwork for the 90's Britpop explosion (which, in turn, influenced many of our modern bands). \nThus, a decade later, Kasabian decided to dust off the movement's sound and give it another spin, their own work borrowing liberally from Madchester's greatest bands -- The Stone Roses, Happy Mondays and "Screamadelica"/"XTRMNTR"-era Primal Scream. The result wasn't terribly original or consistent, but it had enough good tunes to more than balance out the duff ones -- including the absolutely killer single, "Club Foot." Platinum sales and world tours followed, including a stint opening for the Rolling Stones.\nSo, what to do next? Unfortunately, Empire reveals that, like Wile E. Coyote in a minefield, Kasabian has managed to stumble into just about every standard trap that bedevils those bands who strike it big with album number-one. For starters, fearing, perhaps, that they would be forever known as the "Stone Mondays," \nKasabian has ventured further into the 90's for influences -- namely The Chemical Brothers and, to a lesser extent, Oasis. Given the vocal effects, big beats and production tidbits employed, the middle of Empire (from "Sun Rise Light Flies" to "Seek & Destroy") could well have been outtakes from the Chemicals' 1999 album Surrender. Meanwhile, Kasabian's least-successful attempt at branching-out, the acoustic "British Legion," demonstrates that the band doesn't have a Noel Gallagher on staff (at least, a Gallagher at his "Morning Glory" peak). At the same time, some songs are decidedly half-baked -- such as "Shoot The Runner," which is little more than a stomping "c'mon everyone, clap along" beat, the repetition of eye-rollingly banal lyrics and a guitar solo. And many others, such as "Stuntman," are indulgently overproduced, the result of a band going hogwild with the galaxy of effects that a big recording budget can buy.\nWorst of all, while this album has some good songs (particularly the title-song), none grab the listener with the same force as those on their debut. In this sense, Empire is less Augustan Rome and more pre-World War I Austro-Hungary.
(09/28/06 2:55am)
He's a little goofy, perhaps even a little neurotic, but that's precisely what we've come to love about Ben Kweller since his 2002 full-length debut, Sha Sha.\nAnd with his new self-titled effort, we're treated to plenty of that, but also Kweller at his best musically -- an eclectic blend of piano and acoustic guitar -- a sound a bit absent from his harder, more in your face disc -- 2004's On My Way.\nThe single "Sundress" plays like a building leveled by dynamite, starting out as a slow piano piece that all comes crashing to the ground in an insanely melodic and striking chorus, with piano notes and guitar strums as the bricks in a rather beautiful pile of rubble.\nThe album's lead track "Run" literally runs along - from the song's opening piano lick to Kweller's "Whoa ohs" and "Oh yeahs" that intermix with his prose about leaving a small town with his girl. Perhaps this is a song penned for his wife, Liz, who gave birth to their first child at the end of May.\n"Penny on the Train Track" is the most lyrically striking song on the disc. "I'm just a penny on the train track/Waitin' for my judgment day/Come on baby girl let me see those legs/Before I get flattened away" BK sings.\nKweller harkens back to On My Way's harder cuts with the album's concluding track "This is War." With an English accent, this song could easily be mistaken for a Bloc Party or Arctic Monkeys song, as it rolls along at a blistering pace.\nKweller's latest effort isn't quite as spot-on as Sha Sha, but it's certainly a step back in the right direction musically from On My Way. \nOn the disc's most poignant song "Until I Die," Kweller sings, "I'm so sorry/I'm so paranoid/It's something in my head/That I can't avoid."\nIt's OK, Ben -- no need for apologies. We feel you.
