Excess

There is little that can be done in excess that can be considered a good thing.

As I write this, I am the perfect example of why energy drinks are a terrible (terrible, terrible) idea in excess. Two cans of Monster and a cup of coffee to help me overcome the lack of sleep of Little 5 activities only made me stare at a blank screen all night moaning “Ughhh! I need to write this paper!” My body feels grossly overworked, and I’ve just woken up from a sleep that I don’t remember getting prepared for.

Moderation, folks!

TOO MUCH FEMINISM
I also hate feminism when it causes victimization of women instead of empowerment. Too often do I hear a feminist say that a dancer in a music video is being degraded or degrading herself just because some self-righteous woman thinks that she can be a better person. The flaw in feminism is how often a woman chooses to victimize another woman who does not fall into the box of feminist morality standards.

Not every dancer or Hooter’s girl is a whore or monster, and the world doesn’t always see them that way.

Quite honestly, if I had the right body, loved to dance and was offered thousands of dollars to be in a music video, I would jump on that career.

Some feminists need to calm down and accept that some women know how to have fun, even if it includes a blushing-level of anatomical display.

TOO MUCH ALCOHOL
Another excessively pushed notion is, “If you smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol, you die.”

Admittedly, just thinking of the words “alcohol and cigarettes” so soon after the close of my first Little 500 week makes me want to cringe. I’ve never witnessed such an excessive intake of these things in my life, and I can’t imagine being inclined to take a large part in it like my peers did.

However, I don’t think that all alcohol and cigarette intake is bad. That being said, I wish that the stigma of having a glass of champagne every blue moon during pregnancy would just go away. My argument is not unique and has been spewed for a long time, but I will say it anyway: Women did it in the ‘50s, and those children turned out quite all right for the most part.

TOO MUCH REBECCA BLACK
Let’s be honest: Rebecca Black shouldn’t have been as talked about as she was. Awful song and video, I completely agree, but are we really so easily amused that it has to be played every Friday?  Personally, it was never given the chance to be hilarious for me. Much like “The Hangover” or “This is Indiana,” I knew all of the ridiculousness coming to me before I ever watched Black’s masterpiece because of how many people were talking about it.

I’m getting irritated just thinking about it.

TOO MUCH APPLE
Yes, Steve Jobs, I know that an apple a day keeps the doctor away, but too many apples will have you so dependent on the toilet you won’t be able to function.

That was an awful joke, but my point is that a new Apple product every season is just unnecessarily taking advantage of the shamelessly addicted who would sell blood to make sure they are in line to get the newest version (and by newest, I mean less glitchy) of the iPhone or iPad.

Maybe it’s just me, but if I had an iPad, I think I would be satisfied if that were it for a long time. But no. The iPad 2 needed to come out less than a year later, brighter, lighter, with increased battery life and HD cameras.

Frankly, I don’t know which excessive action annoys me most: the insignificant updates given to these products between versions or the people who are first in line to buy every single one.

Of course, my list of excessiveness is becoming excessive, so I will bring my complaining to a close, but for a moment I would like to defend the “That’s what she said” jokes. Those are never too much for me.

That’s what she said.

­— aysymatz@indiana.edu