The administration of magic

I love Harry Potter. I’ve read the books more times than is socially acceptable, and I have been to every midnight movie showing since “Order of the Phoenix.” But like any superfan, I have overanalyzed the Harry Potter universe many times, and I always wonder: Who pays for Hogwarts? Where do the professors get their salaries? If it’s apparently tuition-free, does the Ministry of Magic collect taxes from magical families?

In the real world, it seems Romania, land of Transylvania and the largest concentration of Gypsies in Europe, has considered the taxation of witches.  

In legislation aimed at helping finance Romania’s debt obligations, Romania reclassified witches and soothsayers as a “taxable profession” one month ago.  

It seems logical to tap into this tax base, since an estimated several thousand Romanians have witchcraft or astrology as their primary profession. But a new bill introduced in the Romanian Parliament goes a step further: If a witch’s prediction does not come true, she would be subject to fines or even jail time.  

This has met with considerable protest, and considering the “profession” at risk, the outcry has been distinctly unique. For example, a woman identified as Queen Witch Bratara Buzea (who herself sounds like a rejected Hogwarts professor) said she would fight the law by casting a spell that involved cat excrement and a dead dog.

Many Romanian witches have defended their profession, claiming if their prophecies don’t come true, it is often a result of the client providing false information, skewing the prophecy. Buzea was quoted saying, “They can’t condemn the witches. They should condemn the cards.”

While the Queen Witch might have a point, the idea of legislating to make us feel better about the future is vaguely attractive. It would be cathartic if we could not only blame others for our troubles, but also take them to court over it. After all, if a high school guidance counselor told me that I would make an excellent doctor but I performed poorly on the MCAT, I might feel better if I could sue him for fraud.

But of course, life doesn’t work that way. Our actions are our own, and we should deal with the consequences. Whether we ask for advice from a soothsayer who reads palms in her dirty basement or from a financial adviser who offers guidance in his Armani suit, what we do with that advice is our own problem.

Like other countries facing financial crisis, Romania ought to look at all the factors that led to its needing a 20 billion euro bailout in 2009 and should not expect its witches to be a magic solution to its problems.
 

E-mail: mebinder@indiana.edu