Too fat to fly? Deal.

Silent Bob hasn’t been so silent recently (cliché news story opening accomplished).
Last week, director/actor/geek spokesmodel Kevin Smith started a Twitter campaign against Southwest Airlines after he was bumped from a flight on account of his size.
If you want the full story, listen to Smith’s hour-and-a-half detailing of the events on his podcast, Smodcast.

I’ve been a fan of Smith’s work since I was a youngling. I was also a fat kid (now I’m more of a stocky one).

Despite my past allegiances, I cannot side with the heavy folks in this regard.
Smith’s tale starts off sympathetically, but he continues to paint himself as a martyr, making claims like, “this isn’t about me anymore.”

If this were true, he wouldn’t have demanded Southwest admit he wasn’t fat. Smith mentions how horribly emasculating it is to be picked on by so-called “sizists.”
I’m going to give Southwest the benefit of the doubt; this was not a case of a fat-hating flight attendant but of workers trying to handle a very rocky situation in which they cannot win.

There have to be some criteria for an airline to say “We think you need two seats.” I can tell you now that people will not agree to any kind of physical compliance test like they do with carry-on luggage.

If it’s too humiliating to be asked to purchase another ticket because of size, people will not want attendants measuring girth with a tape measure.

Whether or not Smith could put the armrests down is not the end-all criteria. Because they have to use a per-case judgement, every worker for Southwest is going to make a different call.

Sure airline seats are small, and airline companies are going to try and fit as many people as they can. But that’s the company’s call to make.

I feel weird taking this stance. A few heavier years ago, I might have sided with Smith and demanded the airlines cater to my size. It is incredibly painful to be overweight in a society that clearly makes being thin a priority.

But every shameful day I’ve spent at the beach with my shirt on has been accompanied with the self-realization that it was because of my own choices.

Southwest doesn’t need to change its seat size; we as a country need to change our lifestyle choices.

If you can live a heavy lifestyle and be happy, more power to you. Just realize that your decisions affect others.


E-mail: cquandt@indiana.edu