How I came to hate the holidays

In elementary school I despised the holiday season. Looking back on it now I realize that this was just a disgust that originated from my inherent jealously of Christmas. It is a useless argument really; everyone knows that Hanukkah cannot compete with the behemoth that is Christmas. Those eight candles will never achieve the kind of same marketable appeal that Santa and his reindeer do have.

But as a child I was sensitive to the incessant amount of Christmas-oriented material that circulated after Thanksgiving. The songs we had to sing in choir and the theme of red and green that was everywhere drove me absolutely insane. I started to hate the holidays and grew weary of how ceaselessly it was thrown in my face. I grew bitter and became disheartened by the approach of December.

While I have outgrown my disgust for the holidays, animosity still lingers although it has settled into a subtle annoyance. For one, the multi-colored lights that ring the windows of houses are nothing but a tacky eyesore. These sparkling orbs of love and joy are not things that bring me good cheer. Instead, their presence just adds to the nausea of the holiday.

What probably causes me the most sickness are the carols that come out of every department store, coffee shop and stereo. It is as though every radio station simultaneously decides that Christmas is now an excuse to play bad music. While some may have a few pleasant nostalgic memories about the Christmas season, it does not make any of the music associated with Christmas good. I don’t care how much you remix or cover “Santa Baby” or “You Don’t Have to be Alone for Christmas”; it does not make it a good song, and I do not want to hear it as I’m shopping.

I will admit that there is one thing I absolutely adore about Christmas. After Thanksgiving when the trees are bare, their limbs are strung up in pretty, tiny white lights. These tasteful displays of holiday cheer are not only appropriate, but beautiful as well. So while there still may be nauseating Christmas music escaping out of the windows of stores, walking down Kirkwood with a warm cup of soy hot chocolate is an exclusive holiday season enjoyment.

Christmas is a necessary evil that I have learned to live with. By focusing on the pleasant spirit of the holiday instead of the annoying side effects, I am able to get through the season. There are even moments, however brief, that I appreciate the good cheer that is associated with this time of year.

It is just a pity that I am annoyed by it for the majority of the time.