Endangered species barely staying afloat

You’ve got a paper due by midnight. Your parents are coming to visit this weekend, but your apartment still smells like dirty socks and you’re a little stressed out. But amidst the madness, remember to keep things in perspective – there’s usually someone who’s got it worse than you.

Think of it this way: At least you aren’t a polar bear.

From what we see in the media, it definitely seems like polar bears were dealt a worse hand than any other creature on the face of the planet. As Arctic sea ice levels hit record lows, polar bears are quickly losing critical habitat. And even though they’ve adapted to short-distance swimming with the disappearance of land to rest on, polar bears now often have to swim up to 60 miles to find food – hence the famous “drowning bear” videos.

Still, this is all happening in the world’s hinterlands. Most of us don’t come into contact with polar bears on a day-to-day basis. Personally, I think they’re cute, but I have no desire to ever meet one. Adult males can top 1,500 pounds, and I’m just not willing to risk pissing one them off. Besides, because I own neither an ocean liner nor a tundra buggy, the trip wouldn’t be an easy one.

But that’s just my take on things. Everyone else seems to have hopped on the polar bear bandwagon to the point where supporting the effort to save the polar bears has become the new litmus test for human compassion.

What gives? While polar bears do play an important role as the fuzzy rulers of the Arctic food chain, it turns out there are actually a lot of non-polar-bear threatened species. Scientists estimate that earth loses one species to extinction every 20 minutes, and given that substantial number, shouldn’t we be hearing about more than just polar bears? Why is the rallying cry of “save the whales!” or “protect the baby monkeys!” so common, while we hear nothing about the unfortunate plight of the dung beetle?

Don’t get me wrong – I’m in no hurry to run out and get a T-shirt with a picture of the Kauai Cave Wolf Spider on it. Personally, I think that sounds like something I’d rather have on the bottom of my shoe than see in the flesh. But while there’s nothing wrong with holding up charismatic megafauna as symbols of threatened species everywhere, the danger lies in letting polar bears become the Sarah Palins of the conservation movement –  glorified, obnoxiously visible bastions of publicity that overshadow the slightly more relevant (albeit less soul-stirring) majority. Although less glamorous ecosystem players are lacking in the PR department, they perform such essential, irreplaceable functions as pollinating plants and decomposing carcasses and are at the basis of the entire global food chain.

It’s true that now isn’t a good time to be a polar bear, but there’s a bit more to the situation than just them. Just indulge me, and let’s look beyond the polar bear for a change.

That being said, go clean your apartment because really, that’s just gross.