Oh my God, Britney shaved her head

So evidently, Britney Spears shaved her head the other day. This is important because it is the latest sign she is on a downward spiral from big-time pop star to crazy white trash.\nA few weeks ago, Anna Nicole Smith – who, I guess, represents the bottom of the spiral – died. There is now some legal battle concerning her death.\nPeople care about these things.\nI do not.\nWhenever I go to the supermarket (which, I will admit, is not often), I have to pass the seemingly eternal wait in line while trying to avoid looking at headlines about Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, or about Jennifer Aniston and any manner of famous men. I see these magazines and wonder, why? Why does anyone care about what these people do?\nI am not trying to make a case against celebrities being role models – though I will say any parent who doesn’t explain to his or her children that that cute little girl in the “Herbie” movie is a bad person should be reported to Child Protective Services. I am making a case against the existence of People magazine, E! television and the other entities of their ilk.\nSome would say at this point that reading about celebrities and what swimsuits they are wearing this year is harmless diversionary fun, that it doesn’t hurt anything and that I am just a bitter separatist who hates everything that exists in popular culture for no real reason. I would concede the last point, but the obsession with celebrity culture is not harmless.\nWhen people become totally concentrated on stupid things such as the love lives of celebrities, they begin to ignore the things that aren’t stupid – things like what our government is doing and what is going on in the rest of the real world.\nYou know, the things that are actually important.\nA little bit of stargazing is understandable, as is the fact that people aren’t riveted to CNN all day. The problem occurs when CNN decides to join in on the fun. I even saw “fair and balanced” Fox News air a segment in which an anchor interviewed some Hooters waitresses. At that point I began to feel like I was taking crazy pills. The news probably should not be reporting on celebrities – that’s what the aforementioned E! is for – but it definitely should not be reporting on Hooters waitresses. There is absolutely no news value there, and they should feel dirty for even thinking about it.\nIf you’ve ever seen “Gladiator” and watched it for more than just the fighting, you may remember the scene where one of the senators, Gracchus, makes the statement that “Rome is the mob.” Basically, the emperor was using the games to distract the people from real issues.\nI’m not saying the government makes this happen, but when the people are happy, the government can do pretty much whatever it wants. That’s dangerous. If we abandon the executive branch for Chris Daughtry and that Soul Patrol dude, things could turn out very bad for all of us.