Ever done it in a Wonkavator?

I recently discovered that "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory," one of my favorite childhood movies, was remade into a porno. In the remake, Willy is a pimp by the name of "Sugar Daddy." The entire film comprises Willy punishing his "naughty Oompa Loompas," shackling them with handcuffs made of truffle and striking their tiny, orange duffs with a licorice whip. Though some of the lines from the original script were retained, such as, "Augustus! Get out of the tube!," they were used in vastly different contexts. The remake was appropriately titled, "Willy's Wonka and the S&M Factory."\nAs radically different as these movies may be, however, they still share one striking similarity: they are both fantasy films. In the kiddie version, children fantasize about seeing juicy gumdrops and getting Everlasting Gobstoppers. In the XXX version, men fantasize about juicy buttocks and everlasting lap dances. Nevertheless, in both films, viewers project themselves into these fantastical situations to obtain a kind of "sweet" gratification. \nMy point is this. Pornography has become a very popular form of "eye candy" entertainment for the male demographic, serving as a one-way "golden ticket" to a man's imaginary Candyland. While pornography is generally used simply for raising a man's ... libido, upon further analysis, it can also be used to raise the following debate: Does pornography positively or negatively affect society? \nHas this outlet for endorphin relief helped to provide gratification to a sometimes unsatisfactory sex life? Or, has this industry begun to corrupt our country, slapping America's revered ideas of morality and virtue with a deviant double-sided dildo? The main question is this. Pornography: friend or ho?\nPornography draws a large amount of "positive" appeal from man's instinctive need to procreate. Sexual drive, after all, is ingrained in human nature, like hunger. Humans have the same urge to feed their loins as they do to feed their stomachs. Thwarting such endorphin release through sexual starvation will result in mounting sexual frustration. Pornography is kind of like Advil for the crotch. Additionally, since we are all born with this sexual instinct, it could be assumed that the only reason porn is considered negative in the first place is because of our society's puritanical background.\nHowever, there have also been a multitude of arguments to the contrary, most of which suggest that pornography's deviance pervades our culture. Feminists, for example, often argue that pornography degrades women, treating them like sex objects. They contest that the woman's act of kneeling sexually before the man symbolizes male dominance over females. I, however, believe that if anyone has the dominant gender here, it is the female. She may be on her knees ... but she's got him by the balls. \nPornography has also been accused of corrupting America's youth, especially via the Web. Within the last 10 years, Internet pornography has become a new platform for sexual exploration. It is now electronically ubiquitous, flooding the World Wide Web with a sea of sexual perversion. According to the Barna Research Institute, 82 percent of teenagers have admitted to downloading pornography. And the other 18 percent probably didn't have computers. \nLet's face it, you could weigh the pros and cons all the live long day, but the decision of whether pornography is positive or negative is ultimately up to interpretation, depending on your personal and religious morals. Porn is archetypal; it has both creative and destructive powers. \nPersonally, I believe fantasizing about sex is natural and perfectly healthy, but a problem arises when we allow this fantasy mentality to breach the real world, regarding sex through this kind of perverted "Wonkavision." Spending too much time in this imaginary Candyland can begin to warp one's perception of reality. It is when this happens that porn addiction and sexploitation become palpable problems in society. \nSo remember: It's okay to indulge in this eye candy, but in appropriate moderation. For, as the original Willy Wonka once forewarned, "Sweet teeth are bound to rot"