'The Grey Album' and civil disobedience

Dearest Record Distributors,\nThanks a sarcastic butt load for the $13.68 I received in the mail as compensation for any albums I bought between January 1, 1995 and December 22, 2000 as per your settlement with my state and 42 others regarding artificially fixing prices of new CDs, tapes and records at major retail outlets. With this truckload of cash, I plan to put a down payment on the new Cee-Lo album which is going for just under 20 bucks at Borders. In light of your treatment of recent transgressions against copyright laws by music buyers, I feel this has been a fair and reasonable transaction which in no way resembles involuntary sodomy. \nYours in nuclear rage,\nGreg O'Neill\nI'd mail that, but I'm all out of envelopes. So how did I express my frenzied anger at such a pitiful offering? The only way I know how: by taking laps around local high schools in my Windstar blasting the most perverse rock currently available: Danger Mouse's Grey Album. \nCare to stick it to the man as I so awesomely do? This album is available on several hundred websites and also track-by-track on whatever Napster-esque software you use but aren't supposed to. \nIn case you're in the dark: The Grey Album is a sexy mating of Jay-Z's newest release, The Black Album, with the Beatles' 1968 sprawling masterpiece, The White Album. Using only Jay's vocal track and individual sound bites from each Beatle's instrument, Danger has created a 21st century phenomenon. It demolishes the delicate, Doozer-like structure of copyright laws with all the unbridled joy of a Fraggle (apologies to those who grew up without HBO). \nI'll estimate three possible reactions. First, the purist: "What?! Sampling the Beatles? Blaspheme! Why can't you just stick to obscure James Brown and Funkadelic songs?" Second, the business major: "You can't do that! How's Michael Jackson gonna pay lawyer fees if he doesn't reap royalties from his wrongful share in Beatles publishing?" (How unironic that the business school tassel color is "drab.") And third, normal people: "Hmm?"\nActually, each reaction is valid. The record is all those things. It's extremely interesting and clever, disrespectful to the most canonized pop group of all time and so friggin' illegal it makes me giddy just owning it. \nEarlier this year, there were a couple thousand copies pressed -- many were given away. EMI, who owns much of the Fab's catalogue along with the disfigured King of Pop (EMI, also a corporate contributor to my $13.68), sent a cease and desist letter to Danger Mouse after hearing of this Rockenstein. He complied, but what does it matter when the internet spreads impurities faster than New York's East River? The album was downloaded more than 100,000 times in one day according to www.greytuesday.org. \nThis means you've probably heard of it, so let's get to how good it is. Besides being a wonderful instigator, the album is great. It's one I would unhesitatingly appreciate as art and a rocking good time. Somebody could write a book about it. \nIn a recent interview, Danger Mouse explained how he heard hip-hop in the Beatles' music -- a conclusion drawn, I would guess, from extensive help from Ringo's underappreciated right leg and left arm. Danger's discovery is made quite apparent as familiar harmonies and rhythms from one of the most iconic albums of all time are ravaged, ripped apart and stuck back together in ways which are often so original it electrified my mechanical love for the Beatles. By now, we know these songs so well, the only way to hear them fresh is changing our perspective (Picasso would've made a great disc jockey).\nSince Danger Mouse produced without aid from EMI or a remaining Beatle, he probably used a store-bought copy of the White Album (so awesome). After what must have been some tedious picking and sorting, Danger assembled thousands of split-second shreds of drums, guitars, bass and vocals to form a twisted new stage for Jay-Z's typically acrobatic flow. There are a few missteps and awkward pauses, but when this goulash is at its most delicious, like the new melody Danger creates from bits of the Beatles' "Julia" for Jay-Z's "Dirt Off Your Shoulder," the album is totally justified. \nDo not worry; this isn't brain-dead looping a la Kid Rock or Puff Daddy. This is tasteful blending and reorganizing, as masterful as sampling gets. The Beastie Boys' Paul's Boutique would have competition if this thing were sold in stores.\nBut it's not and Danger Mouse doesn't stand to make a dime. In fact, if EMI (which has recently suffered a tremendous loss of $13.68) has its way, he could pay some hefty fees. It's as though Danger Mouse acted out of a sheer will to create regardless of profit; as if he cares about music and wouldn't retaliate by suing people for not buying it. How quaint. \nLook, I think downloading music is pornographically illegal, but so are monopolies. Since five (soon four) record companies share three-quarters of a market involving thousands (giving them powers not even God has), it becomes clear that no one is doing the right thing. If universities have no qualms about giving our online identities to these people so they can momentarily sustain their failing industry, then I am going to rock as hard as I can. If you want to sue me for that, I will take a picture of the three hundred CDs I bought during the last decade, and we can figure out who owes whom.