Get out of that go-kart

So I've noticed a trend. Since I started writing this column at the wee age of 21, I've gotten a nice handful of reader responses, most of them positive. The only alarming thing is that about 99 percent of them come from females.\nThey're usually very cute and sweet, talking about music and movies and my coining of the adjective "Cusackian." None have ever gotten too extreme -- though I've gotten a few "I love yous" they were intended in that cutesy "Sixteen Candles" sort of way, not that bunny-boiling "Fatal Attraction" sort of way. And while I'm still waiting for one of my loyal female fans to send in a picture of herself naked in a tub of chocolate (hint!), these letters are quite successful at making me smile.\nEgo aside, I'm not really surprised. All through my youth I was always a "great guy," a "best friend" or someone who "understands." I really didn't get into the game until I got to college, and even then it was a rough start. You could say I was a "nice guy."\nTo a degree I'd like to think I still am a nice guy, but not a "nice guy." All through college I've worked to shed the skin of the shy boy who used friendship as a pickup tool, and blossomed into someone who has some initiative in the ways of the fairer sex. It seems like this column has been my "nice guy" outlet, where I can let the softer side of Phil out on a weekly basis and keep in touch with my roots.\nOn that note, I think it's time to give the other "nice guys" a shove. \nThere's the old saying "nice guys finish last," a phrase that serves as an easy excuse for all those kind, understanding souls who sit for hours on the phone with their female "best friend" listening to stories about bastard boyfriends.\nMaybe it's time we light a fire under those nice guys' asses and change the phrase to "Nice guys finish first when they actually enter the race with a car instead of a go-kart."\nThere has been a rash of live journal-esque e-mails and Web links to little articles and columns talking about nice guys and how they care and how they're so great. The most recent was written by a UMass student columnist that provided a nice little "fill in the blank" column written to inspire nice guys into wooing their seven-year crush.\nAnd you know what? I'm kind of sick of it.\nI'm not going to sit here and write a column commending the nice guys because it's time they start doing it themselves. The problem with nice guys is they love sitting around and talking about how they are the perfect match for all the girls they know, but they never do anything about it aside from biding their time as their opportunity passes them by.\nEvery girl I've ever known has always been attracted to a guy with self-confidence, which is a character trait most nice guys lack, even though they are deserving of more self-confidence than anyone.\nSo to all you nice guys out there, stop making excuses. Stop living like this is high school and live like it's the real world. Get up off your ass and talk to that girl. The world is a big place and you have a big heart. Stop making her a bunch of mix CDs subtly impling your hidden affection -- say something real and do it in person, face to face.\nDon't do it because I told you to and don't quote any song lyrics.\nThe worst thing she can do is say "no."\nI'll see you at the finish line.