Stop the madness

I think I have seen it all. During the Q&A of Dr. Cornell West's lecture at IU last month, I saw a middle-aged white man refer to himself as an "undercover brother." Give me a break. Actually, I thought to myself "Aw no he di'int!" Yes, yes he did.\nI do not doubt the man's good intentions, but is it too much to ask that people stop trying to adopt what they perceive to be black culture as their own? If I hear one more person, of any color, earnestly refer to "bling-bling," I may just snap.\nLast semester, one of my favorite professors suggested "ebonics" is a second language. \nDoes this mean I can drop Latin and my foreign language requirement as I am already bilingual? Perhaps I can take English as a second language. Word.\nAll kidding aside, there is some merit to the statement, but I would assert people of color just have a colloquial way of speaking, particularly to one another.\nBut what on earth possesses upper-and middle-class whites to think because they picked up a term while watching Oprah that all of a sudden, they are "down with" black people? \nI have seen this behavior before. In many cases, particularly by people of older generations, it is an honest attempt to reach out to young people in a language the latter are familiar with. This is not exclusive to white people or any race at all -- it is an age thing. But just as it does not work for parents trying to talk to their teens, it does not work when white people from the suburbs talk to black people. It is demeaning, albeit unintentionally so. We are not children.\nEnvision John Ashcroft approaching Colin Powell and saying, "What is up, dog? How is it going, my Nee-gro?" I would imagine Secretary Powell would resign his post immediately and punch the attorney general squarely in the mouth. Then again, my imagination is always more entertaining than real life.\nThere is no legitimate reason to speak in a dialect you are most obviously unfamiliar with. All it does is reinforce the idea you are completely out of touch with whomever you are speaking and makes you look foolish. Often, you appear patronizing. \nThis is not to say that black people hold the monopoly on "ebonics," or whatever you wish to call it. Not all black people talk this way (e.g., Clarence Thomas), and some white people who grew up in the environment sound perfectly natural using it (e.g., Eminem). It is a cultural phenomenon. Either you get it, or you don't. Most people just don't.\nI get it, and I often speak that way when I am comfortable around the people I am speaking to. For example, when I was younger, I would use the phrase "nigga please" to let someone know I thought they were full of shit. (Like Richard Pryor, I stopped saying that because I think it is wrong to call another brother "nigga," but being young and of African descent, it was perfectly acceptable to me and my friends at the time). But because of both my disdain for that word and the fact that my complexion belies my racial heritage, I avoid using it today. Regardless of my intention or how natural it may sound from me because I come from that culture, it would smack of insulting racism to people who do not know me. \nMy advice to you, misguided white America, is to speak how you are most comfortable and familiar. We are not stupid and can understand you just fine, thank you. \nAnd please, don't "let the dogs out" or "raise the roof" ever again.