Sexpert

Dear Sexpert,\nI enjoy performing cunnilingus on my girlfriend but I tend to salivate too much, which curtails her enjoyment. She says it's too "messy." Any thoughts on how I can overcome this problem?\nLap Dog\nDear Lap Dog,\nMany women who confess that they aren't particularly fond of cunnilingus (oral sex) point to this -- the drool factor -- as a primary concern. Unfortunately, salivating is a natural human response, so there isn't too much you can do to stop it from happening. But there are a few things you can do to keep the drool storm under control.\nThe easiest thing to do is perform oral sex with the aid of a dental dam. This thin sheet of latex acts as a barrier between your tongue and her body. All you have to do is hold it up against her while you go down on her, and then carry on as usual -- you don't even have to vary your technique. All the saliva stays on your side of the dental dam, and you get the added benefit of engaging in safer sex. If you have trouble getting your hands on a dental dam supply, a sheet of plastic wrap will serve as a reasonable substitute. I know that this "barrier" method sounds a little less romantic or intimate to some, but if it helps your girlfriend get more pleasure from oral sex, isn't it worth it?\nThe angle of your head can make a big difference. Have you ever noticed that if you lean your head forward and leave your mouth hanging open, it doesn't take very long for saliva to accumulate in your mouth and eventually start drizzling out? Well, it works the same way when you're performing oral sex. If she's on the bottom, keep your head tilted up. One way to put this into practice is to make and maintain eye contact. You'll have to alter the angle of your head to look up at her face. Not only will this decrease drool production, it will greatly increase the level of intimacy. You could also try oral sex while she's on top.\nAnother thing you could try is to alternate oral sex with other forms of stimulation. Breaking up the routine might alleviate the problem.\nYou need to learn how to keep your tongue movements under control. Instead of using your whole tongue, try just using the tip to lightly tease her clitoris. You can then gradually try to increase the amount of contact and pressure with your tongue as you learn to keep the saliva a little more contained.\nAlso, don't underestimate the power of suction. Consider how you eat an ice cream cone. Presumably, you are able to consume it without ending up with a huge sticky puddle in your lap, right? That's because you aren't just licking it, you're actually ingesting it. I'm not suggesting you gobble up your girlfriend like she's a cheeseburger; I'm just saying that you have to take at least as much as you give, if you know what I mean. Alternate straight-up licking with kisses to the clitoris (gentle or more firm, depending on what she prefers). Oh, and swallow often.\nSend questions and comments to the Sexpert at jfinkel@indiana.edu.