I, like many rising freshmen, was absolutely terrified to start college.
Living away from home was a hurdle I knew I could deal with. I thought classes would be just like high school. The thing that made me most apprehensive was something else entirely: bonding with the person I would be living inches away from for almost a year.
Looking back, I have to laugh. I had nothing to worry about, though of course I didn’t know it then.
Feeling anxious about bonding with your roommate is completely normal. I’ve heard many horror stories of roommates gone wrong, but I’ve managed to avoid that. In my two completed years at Indiana University, I’ve had three roommates. Isabelle and I braved the dorms together, and this past year I lived in a townhouse with Sophie and Elysia.
Over time, I’d like to think I’ve become skilled at some very simple things that make bonding with your roommates easier.
First, get used to silent but communal time.
One of my favorite things to do with my roommates is to sit in a common area and scroll through our phones. You might feel weird about it at first, but you’ll want nothing more than some peace and quiet during Welcome Week and the start of your freshman year. A shared comfort with silence will help grow a more sustainable bond between you and your roommates. You won’t always have new stories to tell each other like you do during the first month, so learning how to be quiet together is just as important.
Second, be a good roommate.
This sounds obvious, I know, but it really is important to be conscious that someone besides you is living in the room. Simple gestures like respecting your roommate’s belongings and keeping your own space tidy do wonders for your relationship. This also helps prevent grudges over avoidable issues in a shared living space.
Finally, take breaks from each other.
You might — and probably will — be tempted to spend the entirety of Welcome Week at each other’s sides. That won’t last.
You need to have friends that exist outside of your roommate relationship, so you can take a break from whatever roommate drama you might have and can vent about it to someone if needed. The one time my freshman year roommate and I started getting annoyed with each other was right before a weeklong break, and we were fine after.
You might not mesh well with your roommate, and that’s OK. Maybe you met them online. Maybe they were a high school acquaintance. Or maybe you took a chance with the random roommate gamble. Everyone wants to become friends with their roommate, but that might not be in the cards. Above all else, it’s important to prioritize your living situation — you only have to live with them for a few months.
This story was originally published in the Indiana Daily Student's 2026 Orienter.
