Editor's note: All opinions, columns and letters reflect the views of the individual writer and not necessarily those of the IDS or its staffers.
When I was in elementary school, there were four trees on the lock screen of 2013 Dell computers. The small tree represented elementary students, then one slightly bigger tree for middle school and a large tree followed shortly after to represent high school students. It wasn’t until I was ten-years-old that I saw what the biggest tree represented: college.
For some reason, that scared me. At ten-years-old I didn’t think I could do it. I didn’t know what the future held, and because it was unknown, I assumed it was likely not possible.
When I turned 16 during my sophomore year of High School, I enjoyed the moment. When I turned 17 during my junior year, I began to get nervous; but when senior year rolled around and I blew out the candles for my 18th birthday, the possibility of the future didn’t seem as scary as it had a mere eight years ago. It seemed like life was starting.
The closer I got to the next chapter of my life: it seemed less daunting. By the end of the transition period, I would have a clearer picture of what things would look like, and how my future may turn out to be. However, it wasn’t until just a few days ago when someone asked me, “How are you feeling about senior year?” that I realized I broke my habits.
Yes, I enjoy the moment — but now the unknown is even more exciting to me. I’m not held down to a particular path or level of expectation. When people ask me where I plan to go post-graduation, I don’t know — and that’s okay. It’s okay that I don’t know because it’s going to be an exciting adventure to figure out what’s next.
When I rewind the clock of memories that scatter my mind, it leads me back to the past three years here at Indiana University, which helped me break this habit of fear — slowly but surely, without even realizing it.
During my freshman year, I had so many questions about faith. Which, I would say, is one of life’s most significant “unknowns.” I was previously an atheist, and later an agnostic — believing there could be a potential God who created things after having faith-based discussions with a group of girls I had met during Welcome Week. Later into my freshman year, I began attending their Christian Bible studies. I’d ask them more, and more questions —so sure that there would never be any answers. Of course, like all of life’s mysteries, sometimes there weren’t any direct answers. Over time though, I began to piece together the stories of The Bible and some of life’s questions it would answer. At 18 when I gave my life to Jesus, I understood that not every question would have an answer — and that some things may remain unknown for years to come. Maybe it’s for a future lesson but right now we can’t sit and worry about them now.
While in my sophomore year, I got closer to my now best friend Natalie. We originally met a year prior in the McNutt Quadrangle laundry rooms, but it was at this point that our friendship began to grow. Natalie, always changing her major, was figuring out what she wanted to do. Afterall, there seems to be pressure to “choose correctly” for our “forever careers.” Through all our academic uncertainty though, we knew we’d always have one another.
And lastly, my junior year, which I just completed, really taught me to find the positives in each and every day. While I am a writer for the Indiana Daily Student, I also serve as a Resident Assistant and a Center Desk Associate for Forest Quadrangle. Across these three roles, I’ve gotten to know countless new faces and fellow peers. It’s given me a wide-casting opportunity to put a smile on one person’s face a day. After all, I was working almost every day. I found the interactions to be enjoyable, and I loved making jokes while laughing alongside my work buddies.
If there were three pieces of advice I would give to someone in their freshmen year, inspired by my experience after three years, I’d say first to be open minded that not everything will work out in your plan; second, that not everyone goes into the industry they studied for and that’s okay, and third, to enjoy the next four years.
I can’t believe we only have one more month until incoming freshmen and returning students come back to campus. I’m excited for what my senior year will hold. So, when someone asked me “how are you feeling about senior year?” I responded, “I guess I’m excited that I don’t really know what I’ll be doing.”
Aryana Amin-Tehrani (she/her) is a senior studying marketing, management and digital and social media business applications.
