B-movie curve: B-
Oh hell yes.
The best thing about the third movie of a series is that typical pitfalls that apply to the sequel are actually advantages in a three-quel, as long as they’re done up just right.
In this case, “Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!” is back and more campy than ever.
“Sharknado 3” takes everything bad about “Sharknado 2” and asks, “How could we make this any worse? I mean, it seems impossible, but there’s got to be a way.”
And they do it so irreverently that you have no choice but to love every bloody moment.
Fin has just barely recovered from newfound fame and saving the president of the United States — played by IU’s own Mark Cuban — from a sharknado attack when the most threatening phenomenon yet, a sharknado wall, begins destroying the entire east coast.
It’s up to Fin to save the day, but not without the help of some celebrities you love to forget.
Celebrities like David Hasselhoff, playing Fin’s father, and Frankie Muniz.
That’s right. Syfy dug Frankie Muniz up from whatever cave or crevice of his mind in which he’s been living out his life as alter ego Agent Cody Banks and got him to be in “Sharknado 3,” where all four of his limbs are eaten clean off by sharks.
But that’s not the only triumph of the film. Their biggest feat – Sharks. In. Space.
That’s right. It’s simply not enough that there’s an entire wall of them charging toward the east coast. We asked for more, and Syfy delivered to infinity and beyond.
That’s one small step for shark, one giant leap for “Sharknado.”
My issue with “Sharknado 3” is that more of the action doesn’t take place in Washington, D.C.
Sure, the sharks wreak havoc on Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida, with potential for classic sharknado hijinx, such as one shark swimming up a rollercoaster track.
However, I think there is plenty of missed potential in our nation’s capitol – sharks on the Washington Monument, sharks at the Smithsonian Institution, our very first President Shark taking its oath in the Oval Office.
Despite this minor setback, I’m not quite sure how Syfy will top the smorgasbord of stupid that is “Sharknado 3.” (Remember: sharks in space.) I’m not sure I want them to top it.
But a Chippendales’ dancer does pelvic thrust a shark to its death in the trailer for “The 4th Awakens,” so they’re well on their way.
firstname.lastname@example.org | @bridget_murray
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