The Slob
This roommate can exist at varying levels of sloppiness. Sometimes it’s as irritatingly simple as leaving five pairs of shoes in the living room and some plates on the table. But at its worst it’s a slow collection of dishes in the sink that haven’t been washed in so long you can actually observe Darwinism in a coffee mug. And did this apartment come with carpet? I can’t remember because I can’t see the floor under all of your flannels, Rebecca!
The Clean Freak
You might think the slob is the worst, but at least they don’t mess with your sense of self-worth. The clean freak will drive you up the wall with their strict cleaning schedule that seems to operate on hours to infuriate you — vacuuming at 7 a.m., Kyle, really? And let’s not forget their passive aggressive hints that you need to help like leaving the trash by the door when they leave or when you return home to find a neat stack of your things on your bed.
The Parent
A gift and a curse. This roommate has a need to take care of others. This need can manifest itself in simple gestures like baking you banana bread or always offering to be your DD. But it also has a dark side. Caring can turn to pestering and soon you have someone your own age waking you up in the morning, asking you about your studying, telling you when to go to bed and assigning chores to all the housemates. If they try to come at you with the birds and bees talk, just run.
The Magician
The Houdini of the house. They disappear and are never around. Sometimes you think you hear them get up in the morning, but your only solid evidence that they still exist are the few droplets of water left in bathroom sink. You don’t even remember what they look like anymore. Whatever their reason for always being gone is — classes, work, significant other, exercise junkie — you’re fine with it as long as they keep paying their share of the rent.
The Best Friend
Moving in with your best friend seems like the smart thing to do. Why live with a stranger when you can room with someone you know will watch Bridesday Friday with you while drinking $6 wine? But beware: the best friend can become your worst enemy. When you spend every waking minute together going to class, eating, watching Netflix and studying you become socially exhausted with them. Soon you’re making up homework assignments to avoid eating together and staying late at work so you don’t have to go home and communicate with them.
