Awkward title, epic column

You know what really grinds my gears? When people misuse or overuse words.

Let’s take the word “epic,” for instance. The Greeks introduced the word epic sometime in the 1580s. Their intended definition of epic was “a long poem or story describing heroic deeds.”

Maybe the Greeks used epic to describe valiant battles. Maybe Homer’s “Iliad” was epic. Or maybe the works of Socrates, Plato and Aristotle were described as epic.

Either way, the Greeks didn’t use epic in the same connotation we
see today.

Epic now describes “Call of Duty” kills, beer pong shots, mullets, meals with bacon, “fail” YouTube clips and Taco Bell’s $5 box. If you see epic in a sentence, it’s likely to appear in the following manner: “lolzzzzz roflcopter that fail was EPIC ;) ;)”

Still don’t think epic is overused? Well, let me hit you with some knowledge.

I just Googled “Gears of War 3 forum” and clicked the first website. First off, the site is called “EpicGames.” I proceeded to press “control + f” and type in epic.

There were five results of epic on the first page alone, and that was just in thread titles, people. My two favorite forum titles were “(VIDEO) epic chainsaw kills” and “OMG please epic help!!!!!”

I know I’ll get heat for this one, but is anyone else tired of “swag”? I think UrbanDictionary.com sums up swag pretty well. Its definition of swag rap is:     

“A popular style of rap characterized by its emphasis on swag, rather than lyrical creativity. It can usually be identified by its lack of talent and inspiration, awkward pauses during the verses, and excessive bragging.”
Swag can be funny. Swag can be catchy.

But unless you’re Lil Wayne or Jay-Z, no one wants to hear about how great you are. If you think you have swagger, you really just have a case of arrogance.

There’s nothing wrong with self-confidence, but either keep it to a public minimum, or keep it to yourself.

Let’s take a look at another word adolescent, Abercrombie-doused girls tend to lean on: “awkward.”

The first sign of knowing something is completely overused is that MTV also uses it. Fact: MTV now has a show called “Awkward.”

I understand why teens overuse awkward. I don’t endorse it, but I understand it.
It’s the same reason teens want to wear the same clothes. It’s the same reason teens want to do the same things. Teens just want to fit in.

So, for the average teenager, it doesn’t really matter if a presented situation is awkward or not. That’s not the point. They’re just saying it because it’s a feeling their peers can relate to. Let’s take a look at an oh-so-common usage of awkward:

“Suzie’s wearing the same thing as me to the party! Ugh, it’ll be so awk!“
Note to adolescent teens: Coincidences are not awkward. The fact that two people are doing the same thing or wearing the same thing is not awkward.

However, the usage of the word awkward does indeed make the situation awkward.

The last word I wanted to discuss is, well, a group of words.

“Sick,” “dirty,” and “nasty” have bad connotations if you’re, say, 45 years or older. If you’re my parents’ age, then you’d rather not be sick, you’d rather not have dirty shoes, and you’d rather not have nasty breath.

But the connotations swap if you’re, say, 25 years or younger.

Lil Wayne is sick, his shoes are dirty and, well, his breath isn’t nasty, but the lyrics he spits are. The following conversation with my grandma displays the awkward tension that can arise (see what I did there?).

Grams: “Hi, honey. How’s college?”

Alex: “Totes sick, Grams.”

Grams: “Oh my goodness, is everything okay?”

Alex: “Yeah, my new friends are sick, my class schedule is nasty-nast and Pizza X is the dirtiest.”

Grams: “...You’re feeling okay?”

Alex: “Yeah, why?”

Grams: “Didn’t you just say you were sick?”

Alex: “N00b.”

Other words that are overused or misused but not discussed in this article: like, random and classic.

­— acohn@indiana.edu