America's funniest Twitter feeds

If Twitter is the best new arena for forward-thinking comedy, these eight hilarious feeds are the Dream Team, if the Dream Team never had Christian Laettner. Follow and be amused:

@NeilHamburger
America’s Funnyman assassinates corporations and pop stars and retweets his enemies.
Lay flowers on the graves of those killed by your noxious menu items. @BurgerKing: What’s your favorite thing to do outside when it’s sunny?

@MeganAmram
Self-deprecating dream chaser issues one-liners designed to elicit groans and gasps.
I just found out my cat has Feline AIDS. Now I regret us sharing needles. :(

@JohnMoe
Tech writer and radio host starts bizarre trends, usually entirely by accident.
You see a ghost! With a fedora and machine gums! Who should fugeddaboutit? Ghost mobster fighters! #Ghostcatchers

@RobDelaney
Viral comedian mercilessly bombs Twitter with sometimes political, sometimes offensive and always funny quips.
My uncle Alan suffered a traumatic brain injury & tells people he’s a “jeep.” What I mean is, he’d make a better President than Rick Perry.

@MichaelIanBlack
Onetime “The State” comic plays hashtag games and makes observations that a very perverted Jerry Seinfeld might.
Baseball pitchers lick their fingers more than porn stars about to rub one out.

@shelbyfero
College freshman offers hysterical observations that make us youngsters think we can do this too, though we obviously can’t.
Ugh I hate seeing two guys hold hands or two girls hold hands or a guy and girl hold hands or anyone happier than me.

@PFTompkins
Moustachioed podcast host and comedian keeps his followers up to date on his gym life between his obsessive retweets of John Moe.
There’s a guy at the gym that looks so much like Arthur Ashe, it makes me worried that we will not be released from exercise even in DEATH.