Get it together, ‘Friends’

This Christmas I asked Santa for “Sex and the City.”

If there was one thing Hollywood did right, it was making that movie. Since its opening weekend, the movie has made more than $415 million at the box office.

Now, I’m begging for another sitcom gone big screen: “Friends.”

Since “Sex and the City” hit theaters, there have been rumors swirling that the 10-year-long sitcom might get a chance at the big screen, but the cast members have shot this rumor down.

But my question is why? That show was each cast member’s claim to fame, and what have they done afterward?

Let me break it down for you in order of cast member who needs this movie the most:


Matt LeBlanc
(Joey Tribbiani)
Sir, what have you done since the show ended? Right, you got a spin-off show based on a character that nearly falls flat on his face when not surrounded by the other five.
The show, “Joey,” was canceled midway through the second season.
And since then, you’ve done nothing but get a divorce. Congratulations, you’re just like the rest of America.

David Schwimmer
(Ross Geller)
You were so funny in “Friends.” Your physical comedy is untouchable. But where did you do when you stopped portraying Ross? You starred in “Madagascar” and its subsequent sequel. OK, great, you are now appealing to children.

Lisa Kudrow
(Phoebe Buffay)
So you starred in “The Comeback” on HBO, which failed, and then you had a smattering of small roles in movies. Your most recent one was in “P.S. I Love You.”
That is when I realized how much I missed you. Funny and a wonderful supporting actress in the movie, I was starting to wonder where all your talent went.
Now, every once in awhile I see you on a Nintendo DS commercial for a personal cooking application.
What the ... ?

Courtney Cox
(Monica Gellar-Bing)
You’ve done more than the last three. You starred in two independent films, and you even had a cameo in “The Longest Yard” featuring Adam Sandler.
But then you went on to star in a TV show called “Dirt” about a magazine editor.
The show was interesting at first, but then it just flat out sucked – evident by its cancellation after the second season.
Hopefully your career will launch back when you guest star on “Scrubs” this season for a three-episode arc.
Jennifer Aniston
(Rachel Green)
After “Friends,” I can’t tell which got more popularity: your box office bombs or your divorce from Brad Pitt.
I can’t ever grocery shop without seeing your face plastered to a magazine either talking about your previous relationship with Pitt, your current relationship with John Mayer or how you want to get preggers soon.
As much as you want to run from Rachel Green, you can’t. You need her like you need a third nose job.

Matthew Perry
(Chandler Bing)
You’ve done things almost right.
You went on to star in a TV drama that was interesting, deep and better than NBC’s “30 Rock.” Unfortunately, “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip” only lasted one season. But that’s OK.
You bounced back with an independent movie, “Numb,” that even made me question the sanity of my own life. You’re even starring in an up-and-coming film with Zac Efron as the 17-year-old you.
But throughout the last four years, your characters have all been similar to Chandler Bing.


So let’s face it guys, you need the movie. With or without it, you’re famous because of the six characters. You need this movie. I hope to see you after pre-production.