The fine print

It seems like everybody’s getting in trouble these days – not for their actions, but for their words. Have you noticed how many people out there are just sitting around waiting to be offended by the things that other people say? Just about every other day some politician, religious leader or media personality makes an apology for something he said that caught a bunch of flak. I’ve never understood why someone would go to the trouble to say something provocative and then turn around and apologize when people are provoked! If it needs to be apologized for, don’t say it in the first place; if it doesn’t need to be apologized for, stand your ground. In this column, I plan on saying what I mean and meaning what I say. If I get something wrong I’ll correct myself, but I’m not going to apologize for taking unpopular positions.\nBut because I’m such a sensitive, caring guy, I’d like to try to accommodate those among my readers who have more delicate emotions. So perhaps a disclaimer up front would be a good idea before we get too far into the semester:\nThe views expressed by the author of this column do not necessarily reflect those of IU, especially the Gender Studies, Labor Studies and French departments.\nThe views expressed by the author of this column may be a source of irritation to liberals, Democrats, peaceniks, hippies, socialists and others to the left of the political spectrum. If redness, swelling, headache or foaming at the mouth develop, continue reading until symptoms end. Avoid reading under the influence of marijuana. Smoking this column may be hazardous to your health.\nThe views expressed by the author of this column may lead to heightened awareness of world events, increased patriotism and expanded capacity for logical, linear thinking. Individual results may vary.\nThe views expressed by the author of this column are not “politically correct,” but they are correct, politically. This column is intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. Any reference to actual persons, living or dead, is intentional. “You Know I’m Right” is an equal opportunity column and will not spare anyone on the basis of race, religion, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, age, disability or veteran status.\nNo animals were harmed in the writing of this column, except of course the polar bears that drowned as a result of the greenhouse gases it took to power the author’s laptop. No purchase necessary. Reader must be a citizen or legal resident of the United States. \nNot void where prohibited (Iran, Russia, Venezuela, North Korea and most of the mainstream media, for example.) \nReading this column may be hazardous to your worldview. Sharp right turns ahead. Proceed with caution and an open mind. Reader must accept full responsibility for his own actions.\nOther terms and conditions may apply; for more information, please tune in to the Fox News Channel. \nThe views expressed by the author of this column can be found right here every Wednesday. \nThe views expressed by the author of this column are right.