Throwin' punchlines

Stick a fork in me because I'm done. Finished. Completed. Ruined. Dead. OK, maybe not dead, but my short, glorious career is over.\nOn Wednesday, the Indiana Pacers decided to participate in a "blockbuster" trade involving eight players.\nThe Pacers sent Stephen Jackson, Big Al Harrington, Sarunas Jasikevicius and Josh Powell to the Golden State Warriors in exchange for Troy Murphy, Ike Diogu, Mike Dunleavy and Keith McLeod.\nI'm not really ready to contemplate the thoughts going through Larry Bird's head when he was looking at this trade (that is for another time, another day). But this could be the end of me. \nOriginally for this space today, I had a column about IU basketball coach Kelvin Sampson coaching the Pacers. It was a hypothetical reality-TV show that had conflict, resolution and even a little tragedy resulting from Sampson's hard-nose, grind-it-out, disciplined basketball being taught to the (now former) Pacers. I loved the idea and the story (which, if you're still interested in reading, let me know), but it revolved around jokes made about players who were traded. Now if that story ran, it would be completely irrelevant. \nNow that Jackson is gone, I have nothing. The former Pacers team was a journalistic dream. They had so many problems that they were exposed to so many easy jokes and punch lines. But what now? \nAt least 75 percent of my jokes are now gone. I can't make fun of our new guys for shooting at people at a strip club in Indy. I can't make fun of the Pacers for being ghetto and out of line anymore. Now all I have left is the brawl and Jamaal Tinsley. This trade might not only take the Pacers out of the playoffs, but more importantly, it takes my punch lines out of this semester. \nWith all that said, I need to take my last shots while I have my chance. I did a little research for Jackson about his new home. There is a strip club on 14th Street in Oakland called Geoffrey's Night Club and it's a premier nightclub, according to its Web site.\nAlso, Bob's Guns is in a neighboring city about 15 minutes away. I am sure Bob has reasonably priced bullets for a 9 mm pistol.\nOn that note, why doesn't Jackson just buy blanks, since he's incapable of hitting anyone with his bullets anyway? Just thought I'd throw that out there.\nThis is enough about Jackson, though, because he will always find a way to amaze me, whether he's a Pacer or a Warrior.\nWhat I really want to say is good luck to Warriors coach Don Nelson. You might have got the better end of the deal talent-wise, but good luck dealing with ghetto, trigger-happy, "there's no 'I' in team -- only 'me'" type players.\nAs for me and my jokes? Well, you will just have to keep reading to see.