Bryan House:\nMyth: The inside of the president's residence features lavish and expensive decor, including priceless Renaissance art, all charged to the University's budget.\n"Fact": The interior is decorated in a rather frugal manner. However, there is a vast network of underground caves linked to the house that serve as a conduit to fighting crime. Just ask the president's butler, Alfred.
Herman B Wells statue:\nMyth: Former IU president Herman B Wells is actually encased in this statue.\n"Fact": Herman B Wells never died and is currently the only candidate being considered by the Presidential Search Committee. Take that, Bloomington Faculty Council. I know more than you!
Naked statues of Adam and Eve:\nMyth: This depiction of Adam and Eve is a reminder of our very naughty and sinful nature.\n"Fact": While the library is the popular spot for couples to hook up and get naughty, the naked bodies of Adam and Eve are the most sought-out place on campus for self-gratification.
Jordan River:\nMyth: Once a raging torrent of nature's might, the Jordan River has been reduced to a mere trickle due to urban sprawl and the consciously selfish and wasteful nature of humans.\n"Fact": Sadly, more dead bodies are found in the river every year than Washington's Green River and New York's Hudson River combined.
Red clock:\nMyth: These clocks were put in place at the urging of alumni to beautify the campus.\n"Fact": The frequent melodies sounded by the clocks indicate every time a student is screwed over by the bursar office. Be careful, for the next time the bell tolls, it could toll for thee. At least that's what John Donne said. For the three quarters of you who don't get that last part, go ask an English professor. Or look it up on Wikipedia.
