Doom in the gloom

The game began as the rain continued. Sloppy weather conditions were exceeded only by sloppier football play as the Hoosiers played their final nonconference game against the University of Connecticut Saturday. Soon it grew clear as the skies grew cloudy that this would not be a high-scoring game. Things seemed set for doom in the gloom. \nThen, with 6:05 left in the first quarter, freshman Kellen Lewis replaced junior quarterback Blake Powers. It seemed like a sign from the skies above -- the rain stopped for the first time since the night before, the sky opened up and the clouds parted. The weather, like the Hoosier faithful at Memorial Stadium, waited and watched. \nIt was the return of Lewis at the snap. The Hoosiers' future was here in the present, ready to put the Huskies past them. IU converted a first down for the first time in the game after an 18-yard gain by freshman running back Demetrius McCray. With a fresh set of downs in front of them, the Hoosiers -- \nbehind Lewis -- appeared ready to take care of business. \nFirst down and 10, Lewis took the snap. He stepped back looking for a receiver and found one deep down the left sideline. Lewis flung his arm forward as fans watched the ball soar into the air ... and straight into the hands of Connecticut linebacker Danny Lansanah, who returned the ball 39 yards -- the other way -- for the game's first score. \nHey, at least Lewis threw a touchdown pass, right?\nIf you're not laughing at that, you might want to check your funny bone. Though there was nothing funny about the outcome of Saturday's game, everything was comical.\nComically crappy, that is. \nI thought the defense would let us down, but, as with most things, I was wrong. The defense was impregnable, while the offense was immovable. The only factor more frustrating than the lack of offensive productivity was the back-and-forth baton passing of the quarterback role between Powers and Lewis. At times it seemed as if the coaches were standing in a circle on the sideline, flipping a coin to see who would be the quarterback for IU. \nHeads -- Powers; tails -- Lewis. Neither the head nor the tail of this Cream and Crimson creature could put an offensive number on the scoreboard.\nOn any given Saturday -- on this given Saturday -- on any given possession, a different quarterback could appear. Forget a quarterback controversy in Quarry Land; IU is in a quarterback crisis.\nSo behind the dual arms of quarterback Blaklen Lewers, the game took a turn for the taboo. The IU defense downgraded UConn's running back duo, as the IU offense failed to put up one point despite the efforts of two quarterbacks. Blaklen Lewers threw more interceptions than IU had rushing yards because the Hoosiers did not accumulate a single yard on the ground. IU waited until Connecticut scored its second touchdown to finally score its first. By the final whistle, the final outcome had not left a dry eye in the crowd because the torrential downpour hardly let up.\nMy father once told me a man's ability to weather the bad times is in his ability to laugh when those times are at their worst. Here the Hoosiers are at .500 after a 2-0 start to the season, and after awhile you can't help but laugh at how comical things have gotten. \nYep, things sure are comical in Quarry Land ... comically crappy.