What crazy times we live in. 'Tis a time of accidental, "whoops, my bad," international wars, soccer superstars head butting opponents (then again in the game of fútbol hands shall not be used), sniper assholes shooting up pick-up trucks and (if you believe Mr. Gore) a planet that is dying as fast as kooky Tom Cruise's reputation. With politics and the globe aside, the world of entertainment and pop culture is also important to pay attention to. With that said I thought it would be fitting to give you the current state of pop as we venture into the latter half of the '00s. \n
Movies:
\nWhile there is much to say about the shape of film in Hollywood, the two biggest trends today seem to be remakes and superheroes. While film remakes general linger in niche genres--horror, bad '70s and '80s television, films from East Asia or shitty films that weren't good to begin with--this movement does not seem to be going away and it shows a truly depressing lack of creativity in Hollywood.\nSuperheroes movies are fun and will always rake in the Benjamins for big powerhouse studios, however, like everything else these movies will die down eventually. Soon people will realize that certain comic book characters don't deserve their own films (Thor anyone? No. How about Ant Man?). Hollywood needs to start exploring other venues to utilize their technological advancements. \nFuture Prediction: In an act of secular devotion (and quite possibly celebrity stupidity) Tom Cruise will realize his net worth, obtain a space craft and attempt to prematurely reunite his soul with the extraterrestrial beings that sent him to earth (seriously people, Wikipedia Scientology some time. Fascinating what these people pay to believe). Technical difficulties will cause his vessel to malfunction. He and dust-head wife Katie Holmes will perish by way of evaporation. Kanye West will headline "MI:4" in his acting debut. Meanwhile, Mel Gibson will begin production of his biggest film yet simply titled "Mel Gibson's Bible: Old Testament." Nick Nolte will star as God, with Bill Maher as Moses. \n
Television:
\nIs it just me or has television gotten more worthwhile in the past couple years or so. With the exception of Reality or "look at me!" TV there has been a surge of quality television series and with the advent of television on DVD shows have never been more enjoyable. Take "Lost" for example, a show that is as mysterious and intriguing as "The X Files" or "Twin Peaks," while also benefiting from a bit of guilt free soap operatic themes. This along with programs like "House M.D," the late but great "Arrested Development," HBO's social/pop savvy "Entourage," and Animal Planet's "Meerkat Manor" (cute is an understatement when it comes to these little buggers) are proving that television is now worth paying attention to. \nFuture prediction: Following the actions of the now incarcerated Richard Hatch--the first winner of "Survivor" and in many ways the first reality TV star--that anger crazed bitch from "Donald Trump: The Show" AKA "The Apprentice" will be arrested for assault by use of finger nails and spend some time in a state penitentiary. Her prison stint will start a new Reality TV craze where others, including the entire good for nothing veteran cast of "Real World"/"Road Rules," will take on their biggest challenge ever--the joint. Reality TV as we know it will then shift gears and go the way of HBO's prison drama "OZ" in which ex-reality stars must face the harsh conditions of the American penal system. That studly but foolish dude from "Joe Millionaire" will be picked up for a tax fraud and land in prison only to catch a shank to the gut by a guy with a tattoo of Moses parting the Red Sea on his back. He will survive but unfortunately will be forced to join the Aryan brotherhood along with the lead dork from "Beauty and the Geek."\n
Music:
\nAfter the late '90s and early '00s reeked of weak pop boy band trash (see N'Sync etc.) and poorly delivered pseudo punk boy band rubbish (see Simple Plan etc.) we had a nice return to simple throwback, garage band rock and roll with a twist, thanks to groups like The Strokes, The White Stripes and Franz Ferdinand to name a few. While those groups continue to put out innovative records there are also a number of artists that fit nicely in the independent arena (take relatively newcomer Sufjan Stevens) or groups creating unique sounds that blend styles together (Gnarles Barkley) who are also making a splash. The bottom line is after years of slums in new music we are now more than ever treated to artists who are determined to challenge the always-changing world of music. Let's just hope this trend continues.\nFuture Prediction: While the majority of people in the U.S. continue to probe the life of spotlight musician/courtroom drama luminary, Michael Jackson, we will fail to pay attention to the equally bizarre Prince resulting in an unfortunate media fiasco. The reluctant sex fueled, high-pitched wonderstar turned Jehovah's Witness will assemble a crew of pawn like spiritual purple followers and commence with a David Koresh Waco style stand off. The televised debacle will result with the ATF raiding the Minnesota compound and forcing the minions out with purple haze gas. Prince will survive the ordeal and in prison will be born yet again, taking the name of Prince Jehovah and then later, simply God. \nWell, I'm out of room. So there you have it. A Sign O' The Times.
