Those feisty homosexuals

On the eve of the Iraqi election, Condaleeza Rice gave a beautifully written speech about freedom for all people. She subtly condemned our forefathers for slavery and spoke of how, through the democratic process, injustice in the system can be fixed.\nI, too, believe in freedom and democracy whole-heartedly. Still, I had a hard time listening to her speech with the concurrent knowledge that a whole population of people is still being constantly denied basic rights and freedoms.\nAnd it reminded me of a bus ride. Nothing monumental, no Rosa Parks or civil disobedience, just the Stadium Express and an overheard "some of my best friends are gay."\nMy ears perked up. By now, everyone knows that the nefarious "some of my best friends are (insert minority here)" can never be followed by anything positive. So I eavesdropped for a minute and heard quickly thereafter the authoritative statement "and I can tell you that gay culture is a culture centered entirely (on) sex. It's amazing." \nHow forward thinking that a heterosexual woman could be so intrigued by the gay culture as to make such an academic observation. \nForget Oscar Wilde, Tennessee Williams, Virginia Woolf and numbers of others I have neither the time nor space to mention. Forget that according to the 2000 census results, about one-third of lesbian households have children, that gays everywhere are fighting for the right to marry, and that many gay people will live their whole lives without ever feeling safe enough to come out. Apparently, all the music, plays, movies, television shows and other cultural contributions by or about members of the gay community are just elaborate attempts to get laid.\nIt's these kinds of statements from supposed "allies" to the culture that can be most damaging. People who think they've never met a gay person are more likely to believe someone who claims to be an "insider" to the gay community. And someone who believes that gay culture is a solely sexual culture will have a hard time relating to gay and lesbian individuals as normal human beings.\nAfter all, there are plenty of heterosexuals who aren't exactly chaste, but I have not yet heard anyone claim the sex-centricity of the heterosexual culture.\nAnyone who has seen Britney Spears' latest videos, watched the show "Desperate Housewives" or been to a singles club could craft a pretty good argument for sex in the straight world.\nBut no one does.\nWhy? Because the American heterosexual population is a vast, diverse group that cannot be typified by a couple of television shows and some not-so-modest individuals.\nBy now, plenty of people have seen, or at least heard about Showtime's "Queer as Folk," and from what I gather, some base their whole perspective of queer culture on that program (or "The L word," Bravo's "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" or NBC's "Will & Grace"). But it's television. It doesn't reflect reality, it reflects ratings, and ratings reflect how viewers want the world to look. \nSure, in the gay culture, there are prostitutes, sex shops and pornography, but those enterprises are everywhere. Although it does seem that certain gay people are willing to be more honest about it, let's face it: If there weren't a lot of sex in the heterosexual culture, most of us wouldn't be here.\nFamed poet and literary critic Audre Lorde said that "in our work and in our living, we must recognize that difference is a reason for celebration and growth, rather than a reason for destruction." I can't say it any better than that.\nSo this February, as we celebrate Black History Month, let us not smile smugly and tell ourselves how advanced we are that we've "ended" discrimination. We are already repeating the past.