Holes in social etiquette

On a campus laden with tattooed, eyebrow- and nostril-ringed hippies and their typical opposites, sorority sisters, I'm having a hard time figuring out exactly what everyone's problem is with my septum ring.\nI wear my ring simply because I like how it looks. It neither possesses me to terrorize old ladies nor subject the world to pretentious, coffee-house poetry of my own composition. It in no way hinders my abilities to function socially, academically or professionally. Therefore, of course, it requires the general public to impose their anti-septum-ring opinions on me at all times.\nPeople do this in a few different ways. The first is to condescendingly offer their helpful advice, as was the case with a Collins resident, sporting a zero-gauge labret (in English, kids, that means she has a gaping half-inch hole between her chin and bottom lip that leaves her lower gums constantly exposed to the outside air). She told me that I should really consider a "cuter" nostril ring -- one that clings to just one side of my nose -- because moving it over those few millimeters just makes me seem so "unapproachable." \nThe second way is to make inane and easily avoidable queries regarding the piercing. Everywhere I go (and I mean everywhere), I am constantly asked the question: "Did that hurt?" \nHmmm. Allow me to reflect upon that poser for a moment. Did that hurt?\nTo any of you out there who have ever even considered asking someone that question, please take a nanosecond to imagine what it feels like to have a stainless steel needle rammed through your nasal cartilage so you may finally realize that this is a question that never needs to be asked. \nRemember ol' Uncle George pulling his hilarious "got yer nose" routine, then realizing that one of your inner nostril walls is harboring a petrified, razor-sharp, stalactite-style booger? Anyone who has experienced this is aware that having one's septum prodded by a pointy object of any kind can instantly bring even the most macho of us to tears.\nNo doubt, those questions and comments are a daily annoyance, but they are made out of obvious stupidity, of the most pure and innocent Baby Huey variety. That I can handle. What I have a real problem with are the comments based on sheer meanness: the third method of confrontation. \nRecently at work, I went out of my way to assist a Jordan Avenue-type, who quickly went from merely impolite to downright evil upon learning that the store was ill-equipped to furnish his dire sporting-equipment needs. He followed an abusive string of insults with, "And I'm telling your boss to make you take out that ugly nose ring. It's totally unprofessional!"\nI don't think it was the utterly inhumane treatment I received at the lad's hands that bothered me so much; it was the fact that anyone who would wear a sun visor backwards and upside-down (on a gray day, to boot) felt justified in taking it upon himself to impart his fashion wisdom to someone like me. Thanks, Junior, but I can do without your suggestions. \nWhy are total strangers so blatantly rude about so seemingly trivial an issue? My theory is that these people think they're employing the "tough-love" tactic in a misguided attempt to help me see the error of my ways. In either case, I wish they would practice a little restraint. Everybody's appearance is distasteful to somebody else, and since I see the obvious futility in trying to please a society full of different people with different opinions, I dress for myself and no one else. \nSo if you keep your disparaging "bull ring" taunts to yourself, I'll reciprocate by pretending not to notice the flab cascading down the waistband of your too-small hip-huggers.