Customers curse capitalism

Work sucks. And everyone participates. For every disgruntled employee who toils away at a place of business they loathe, there is an obnoxious consumer to frequent the place and give them a reason to loathe it. They check. They balance. They keep capitalism rolling.\nAs a consumer you probably hate me. I'm the person who charges you for the parking lot ticket that seems to grow exponentially in your book bag. Sometimes, I'm not too fond of you either. Like you, in the new Explorer -- I know you didn't lose your ticket. Pay up.\nIt would be selfish of me, though, to spend this space whining about how other people make my job hell. That kind of self-serving prattle wouldn't be fair. I am, however, going to complain about how other people make other people's jobs hell. Because it seems to me that there are employees in this town who do deserve some bellyaching time.\nMy prime example would be the late shift staff at the Walnut St. Taco Bell. I don't think I've ever seen a more disgusting, belligerent crowd than that which accumulates at Taco Bell at two in the morning. But the Taco Bell staff, God bless them, patiently takes the slurred request of every tube-topped barfly ("ummm, extra to-mat-o?") and loud-mouthed jackass ("dude, I only have 37 cents") until all are chomping happily on faux-Mexican goodness. When I finally get to scream my order, they always deliver my Mexican Pizza-minus-beef far more efficiently than any other Taco Bell I've ever been to. And they pretend they don't even notice when non-patrons borrow their toilets for puking purposes. Each and every member of that valiant crew deserves employee of the year.\nAnother unsung hero of the work force is my favorite Waffle House waitress. A few weeks ago I watched in admiration as she single-handedly served an entire restaurant of omelet-deprived customers. I think it's amazing that a person can wield a coffee pot like it's an extension of her arm. But an oaf at a nearby table remained unimpressed. Not noticing that she was already taking care of 17 other tables, he felt the need to make loud comments about the service when he wasn't greeted in the first 30 seconds he sat down. He was later compelled to dump several packets of sweetener on his friend's head. \nIndeed, wonder-waitress was momentarily fazed. But somehow she managed to sweep the sugar-coated baseball cap right off Joe College's head, dump the offending powder into the garbage without spilling a crystal, and remain calm and forever friendly through the whole situation. Believe me, if she could that handle that kind of crisis without raising her voice, this woman should be negotiating peace treaties. I would go broke tipping her what she actually deserves.\nThe customer is not always right. In fact, as Ben Affleck's retail character in "Mallrats" suggests, the customer quite often behaves like a certain human orifice. Anyone who works with the public can identify these orifices, and will categorize them as such during their break time with co-workers. Remember though, when you feel like a victim, someone is dealing with worse orifices. And also remember that for the work-suck-cycle to perpetuate, you have to be the jerk some time. You can blame it on that last drink, your bad day, or a brief lapse of maturity -- but don't ever the disregard the fact that you might be a bad customer.