Your bird is officially leaving the nest. For almost nine months, your child will set their own schedule, do their own laundry and figure out where to get three meals a day, all on their own.
Between planning what to do with your child’s soon-to-be vacant room and watching them dive into college life, feeling a little disconnected is normal. As a student who went through this process with my own parents, I’ve picked up a few things about how to stay in touch. Here are four ways to stay connected with your Hoosier.
Discuss boundaries
Before move-in day, have an honest conversation about expectations. College is a nerve-racking adjustment for students and the urge to check in constantly is completely understandable.
But too much contact can strain the relationship more than the distance itself. As your student begins discovering independence, a steady stream of calls and texts can feel overwhelming rather than comforting.
Sit down together before the semester starts and talk through what staying in touch looks like for both of you. Agree on a time for calls or check-ins that respect their new schedule and stick to it.
Once a teenager is treated like an adult, they will act like one — sometimes.
Send a care package
Getting used to college life is often a long process and it can be overwhelming at times. Even now, receiving a package of goodies from my parents brings a bigger smile to my face than any text could.
Nothing says “I’m thinking of you” like something waiting in the mailbox. It doesn’t have to be elaborate. A handwritten card, their favorite snack, a gift card or a few extra dining dollars on their account can go a long way during a brutal week of midterms.
The gesture matters more than the contents, though having a meal paid for never hurts.
Show up to school events and games
This one is especially important for parents who live close enough to visit, but even if you’re a ways away, it’s worth the journey. Luckily, IU gives you plenty of reasons to make the trip.
Plan a weekend around a football game at Memorial Stadium, catch a performance at the IU Auditorium or grab lunch on Kirkwood Avenue and let them walk you through their favorite spots on campus. The point isn’t the event itself, but showing up in their world instead of always asking them to come back to yours.
You don’t have to wait for a big occasion to come down, either. Sometimes just showing up is enough.
Keep your door open
College is a whirlwind, and your student isn’t always going to have the bandwidth to reach out as often as you would like. Patience goes a long way during this transition, for both of you.
When they do call, make it easy. Lead with curiosity instead of worrying and asking about their friends, their classes and what they’ve been up to. If they know they can call home without feeling interrogated or guilted, they will.
Keep in mind that sometimes that call comes at 11 p.m. on a Tuesday or right after something went wrong, like a failed exam or a late night out. Those are the moments that matter the most.
Feeling comfortable enough to call my own parents whenever I needed got me through some of my hardest disappointments and frustrations in college. Give your student that same thing.
College goes by fast, faster than either of you will expect. Staying connected just takes a little intention, a lot of patience and showing up in whatever way you can. Your Hoosier needs to know you’re still there, even from a distance.
This story was originally published in the Indiana Daily Student's 2026 Parent Guide.
