The kiss

Spring break is over and, while I’ll miss the company of my parents and old friends, I can once again continue my love affair with IU. Odd maybe, but I’m unembarrassed that it’s true. IU has been a great institution, both academically and socially, to attend and I will inevitably give back to the IU community after my graduation in 2008.\nThe traditions of IU are its definition. From the main event of Little 500 to the newly realized touching of “The Rock,” traditions will be remembered. Lately, I’ve been reminded of specific tradition and what it reveals about IU: the sharing of a kiss a Rose Well House after midnight in order to initiate young females as coeds at the University. Rose Well House is on the National Register of Historic Places, as well it should be. \nBut what Rose Well House reminds me of is that the relationship between IU and any given student can be quite readily compared to a first kiss. (Yes, you read correctly and, no, I am not crazy. Well, maybe a little.) For example, my own relationship is obviously a result of the first few months at IU being much like an eyes shut, make-her-heel-pop smooch that won’t be forgotten anytime soon. I hope IU feels the same way. I am a pretty good kisser after all.\nHowever, many first kisses don’t go so well with IU. Those students who come for a college visit and fail to be impressed with IU’s academic prowess, beautiful campus and capable faculty are prone to two comparisons. Either they give a quick kiss on the cheek and then quickly run away, or they don’t kiss back. Either way, IU’s heart hurts. These people generally pass up the warmth and bountiful beauty of the cream and crimson for the cold, metallic, lips of that school to the north.\nAnd then of course there is the most awkward tonsil-hockey game available to students. That is when the preliminary kiss seems good, just the right amount of moisture, not too aggressive but not weak and everything is looking up. Generally, a nice stable kiss. But then the two really get to know each other and realize they aren’t one another’s type. Perhaps the student expected more mechanical classes to be offered. Maybe IU just couldn’t take their stenches. Who knows, but the honeymoon is definitely over. These students generally transfer to another school or go home, to get married to a job.\nGenerally, to conclude my column I would take a walk down memory lane of my Hoosier experience. But because of space limitations and a strong urge to return to my narcissistic gratification ways (see any column I authored prior to October 27, 2006) I think I may proceed with an ulterior motive this time. Anyone who wants to take a shot at replacing IU in my heart with a better first kiss, let me know. My e-mail address is in the upper right-hand corner of this page.