Smokin' dat chronic Wii

Ever since Nintendo came out with the Wii, marijuana connoisseurs everywhere are a little more confused than usual. Maybe this is just because I'm on a college campus, but I've heard many complaints that "Wii" sounds almost exactly like "weed." Thus, there are many misunderstandings to be had. Where's the best place to score some Wii? Should they legalize Wii? Blaze the Wii out there.\nPsychoactive drugs aside, my first Wii experience was captivating. It was Wii Sports at a friend's house. I made a digital character that looked just like me and I named it Ramrod. I was brand new to the concept of Wii, and the idea of people accidentally flinging their remotes into their televisions in the heat of the moment was both hilarious and exhilarating. God bless wrist straps. \nWhen I was in high school, I played varsity golf and competed twice in the state finals (Are you impressed? Will you go out with me?), but I managed to sextuple bogie playing Wii golf. I gave up after the first hole.\nI managed to redeem myself by pitching a no-hitter in Wii baseball. The best part was when the game zoomed in on my character's carefully chosen condescending smirk every time I struck out my opponent.\nBut I have a confession to make. It wasn't my mad skillz that made me excel at Wii baseball. My friend was just really, really, exceedingly, horribly bad at it. And, well, I don't know how to say this without bringing eternal shame to myself and my family, but…I suck at video games. I just randomly hit buttons and hope for the best.\nI wasn't allowed to have video games when I was a kid. I missed out on a huge part of American culture. I have trouble relating to my video-gaming friends. When my friends were growing up, they played "Donkey Kong." Now, in college, they play Drunkey Kong. Mario was their best childhood buddy, and I didn't really know him that well. Awkward. \nI've been roped into playing "Halo" many times, and I usually die within the first 30 seconds. My killing skills are severely lacking. I wish I could be as blood-thirsty as my peers.\nDuring my childhood I didn't really feel like I was missing out on anything without video games. I was more interested in creativity and imagination. Lame, I know. \nI was, however, allowed to play educational computer games. As a small child I learned basic math from Alf. I learned precision target shooting with a hunting simulation game. Imagine a 7-year-old girl sitting at a dinosaur of a computer shooting clay pigeons. Sadly, those marksmanship skills haven't translated well to high-powered assault rifles.\nBut no one is immune to the concept of gaming. I'm usually the first person to whip out my cell phone and start playing "Tetris" in life's boring situations. I was vaguely interested in "Grand Theft Auto" when my friends taught me the cheat codes for going on a rampage with a golf cart and a chainsaw.\nIf I was handed a video game controller as soon as I emerged from the womb, just like the other members of my generation, I might be better at Wii putting.