Slogan slugging

Last Wednesday, the state of Indiana launched a new slogan to try to draw in the tourists. Are you ready? Here it is:\n"Restart Your Engines."\nHmm, yeah -- that's what we thought too. \nTying it to the Indianapolis 500 wasn't a bad idea -- at least it's something out-of-staters will recognize (and we do have a racecar on our state quarter). But the slogan is kind of limited in focus. Not to mention that it sends a mixed message. The Indianapolis Star quoted Tom Schuman, a spokesman for the Indiana Chamber of Commerce as saying: "Potentially, it carries a lot of different meanings when you hear it ... What we like about it is that it also can apply to business efforts -- hopefully, it's going to encourage the entrepreneurial climate Indiana has struggled to achieve so far" (April 23, 2006). So, not only does it carry a message of Indiana as a place to feel rejuvenated -- and get your car fixed -- it also comes with an aura of economic desperation. Because, you know, if there's one thing we've learned from the downtown bar scene, it's that desperation's always attractive.\nHowever, what's really amazing is that the state paid Thomas Hirons' advertising agency $90,000 to develop and test this slogan! $90,000? For "Restart Your Engines?" Why, for $100, we on the editorial board could have come up with something better. Heck, we'd have done it for a couple large pizzas and a 2-liter of pop (as long as it wasn't diet -- blech).\nBut, just to show that we're loyal citizens/residents of the Hoosier state, we on the editorial board met in our yurt over by Mongolian studies and did a little brainstorming. And we think we have some compelling ideas.\nFirst of all, how about something that doesn't focus solely on Indy? Say, what about the area around Terre Haute: "A federal penitentiary less than an hour from a chemical weapons dump? Indiana: More Exciting Than You Think!" Or the Gary area: "Why watch 'Robocop' when you can live it?" Or something invoking both the hills of southern Indiana and Indiana Dunes National Lakeshore: "Hey, check out the mounds on this state!" Or for the lovely Brown County area: "Indiana: We've got trees!"\nOr we could always come up with a slogan from Indiana's rich history, like "Indiana: no major combat since 1863 (screw you Tennessee)" or "Home of the Kinsey Reports -- Hoosier daddy, baby?" or "The Other Land of Lincoln (screw you Illinois)" or "Indiana: the comforts of the 19th century, the conveniences of the 20th." \nOr we could draw upon Indiana's rich stock of celebrities: "Indiana: home of the beautiful people -- like Larry Bird and David Letterman," "Home of America's cheeriest writer: Kurt Vonnegut" or "Indiana: Michael Jackson-free for over three-and-a-half decades"\nFinally, there's one that lies near and dear to our heart -- one that persists despite the millions of dollars IU spends annually on marketing: \n"Indiana: home of the University of Indiana"