Movie depicts homosexuality, God

The struggle of being homosexual, Christian and undergoing "ex-gay" programs was highlighted in a film shown Monday in the Monroe County Public Library called "Fish Can't Fly: Conversations about God and Struggling to be Gay."\nThe film was shown at the Bloomington Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays' monthly meeting and was co-sponsored by Bloomington Beacon and the IU Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Student Support Services office.\nThe goal of the event was "for the audience to listen to lesbian and gay people's candid descriptions of reconciling their spirituality with their sexuality," John Clower, event coordinator and a board member of the Beacon Center, said in a previous Indiana Daily Student article.\nThe film traces the lives of eight people who have gone through "ex-gay" programs that Eric Rensberger, a licensed clinical social worker, called "brain-washing centers," by some in the film.\nThrough daily Bible reading and "ex-gay" support groups, these programs try to stop something they see as "wrong in the sight of God (and) an unhealthy and destructive behavior," according to a statement by Rev. John J. Smid, executive director of Love in Action, on its Web site. \nLove in Action is one of the largest "ex-gay" programs in the country. It does not try to change a person's sexual orientation but rather "help people align their behavior with their faith," according the Web site.\nFor many of people in the film, the "ex-gay" programs ended in suicide attempts. It didn't change any of their sexuality.\n"It showed very honestly what it feels like to be a person of faith dealing with your sexual orientation," said Rev. Lynnette Carlson of Unity of Bloomington.\nThe belief that homosexuality is wrong is probably very widespread in churches in this area, but Carlson does not know about any "ex-gay" programs in this area, she said. It does, however, have many communities of faith that are open and accepting to homosexuals.\nOn the Exodus International Web site, an umbrella group for "ex-gay" programs across the nation, the only "ex-gay" program in Indiana identified is Fresh Word Ministries in Evansville.\nThe most important thing for someone struggling to reconcile their faith with their sexuality is to find a "circle of friends or an accepting faith community," said Doug Bauder, coordinator of GLBT Student Support Services office at IU.\nMost of the time they are not looking for a psychologist, Bauder said.\nThe Bloomington Beacon Center is a group that is trying to provide a place in Bloomington where homosexuals can go to get the support they need, said Jarrod Cox-McGlocklin, a Bloomington Beacon board member.\nCurrently it is trying to raise the needed $50,000 to rent a building downtown to form a GLBT community center.\nThe need for a place to find acceptance and friendship was highlighted in the movie. The turning point in the life of a man in the movie was when people in a support group accepted him even though he was gay.\n"We still love you," they told him.\nThat little bit of support helped him to accept himself.\nThe problem Rensberger sees with the "ex-gay" programs is that they use psychology to explain their methods.\n"They use old, archaic, discarded, theoretical model," Rensberger said.\nThe "ex-gay" programs started out as a positive experience for the people in the movie. Some of them even came out of the program and got married, but all of them said they were not changed on the inside. They were just playing a part.\nEven homosexuals who don't believe in God have problems accepting their own feelings sometimes. Some "humanist homosexuals" think of it as "against nature," Carlson said.\n"I thought the church had the corner on that," she said.