Avoid "Marci X" by any means necessary

Apparently, Hollywood decided recently that any time a white person says words like "gangsta," "wack" or "phat," the audience will burst out laughing. How else can one explain "Head of State" or "Bringing Down the House?"\nWell, it's not funny and hasn't really been funny since Barbara Billingsley spoke jive in Airplane! 23 years ago. Now, we have Marci X to add to the pile.\nMarci X is so clueless about its subject matter, hip hop, that the laughs come out of pity. This film attempts in-jokes and references that haven't been hip since about 1991.\nApparently, the word is out on Marci X. The critics from major publications didn't get an advance screening, and when I viewed the film, it turned out to be a private screening as this critic was the only one in the theater. If a movie stinks in the woods and nobody's there to see it, does it make a smell?\nIn a role that is only a slight variation on her Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion character, Lisa Kudrow plays Marci Feld, the socialite daughter of a successful Jewish businessman (Richard Benjamin, also the film's director). Among his business holdings is Felony Assault Records, a rap label that he doesn't even remember buying. When rapper Dr. S (Damon Wayans), who records for Felony Assault, makes a controversial album -- sample song titles include "Power in My Pants" and "Six Grades Is All You Need" -- Senator Mary Ellen Spinkle (Christine Baranski) is outraged, encouraging people to avoid patronizing Marci's father's businesses.\nShocked by the outrageous charges, Mr. Feld suffers an incapacitating heart attack. Desiring to prove her street savvy -- "I adore black people!" she exclaims -- Marci takes the responsibility of meeting with Dr. S and magically transforming him into a sensitive ladies' man. Gradually, she weans him away from girlfriend Yolanda, played in arch-J. Lo fashion by Paula Garces, and pulls him away from his allegiance to label boss Tubby, played in arch-Suge Knight fashion by Billy Griffith.\nA lot of cliches and stereotypes are present and insidious: the Jewish-American princess; the sexually voracious rapper; the culturally clueless, repressed conservative; and of course, white people using and misusing hip-hop terminology.\nWhen the humor doesn't merely fall flat because it's unfunny, it falls flat because it's dated. And what happened to Lisa Kudrow's film career, highlighted by an excellent performance in The Opposite of Sex?\nMaybe she thought the script was phat.