Terrorist attacks affect sports, too

My column-writing schedule took a hit last week. With Thursday's column, a Kentucky preview, already written, IU announced it would cancel or postpone all athletic events, including Saturday's home opener against Kentucky. \nThat also canceled my column. \nI'm disappointed I was disappointed.\nSo, here were are again, five days before another football game but with a different perspective on IU football and on life.\nLast week wasn't easy to swallow. Neither was IU's 35-14 loss at North Carolina State, but in an entirely different way. \nI just can't decide if sports really matter of not. I can't decide if my career as a sports fan who watches football, eats the free press box food and writes about the game really matters. I can't decide if Cam Cameron's job security really matters. \nOur national security carries more weight. \nAntwaan Randle El said he wanted to play. Tommy Jones said he didn't think IU should. Joe Gonzalez said he was ready to serve his country. All understood the severity of last week. All had perspective.\nEventually, I gained mine. \nI was excited to watch IU meet Kentucky. The sight of IU practicing -- some players wearing red practice gear, some white and some Kentucky blue -- and red-and-white striped tents popping up around the stadium concourse made me smile. \nInitially, Thursday's decision to cancel or postpone the football game and all IU athletic events upset me. Then, perspective crept in. I called home. I called my friends. I called my family. I realized a weekend spent at home playing golf with my girlfriend, eating dinner and lighting a memorial candle with my mother and visiting grandparents was far more appropriate than four hours in a press box charting football plays and igniting column ideas. \nAlready, I'm anticipating this week's game against Utah. But I'm also wondering what will happen between now and then. I'm wondering what Memorial Stadium will feel like. I'm wondering if another catastrophe will again keep IU from playing.\nSaturday should be fun. Crisp, cool, sunny and full of tailgating, beer and steaks. It should feature hope for an IU football team that insists it will rebound. Cream and crimson flags should wave in the parking lot. The Marching Hundred ought to play IU's fight song. \nThose events will happen. But conversation will revolve around potential war, patriotism and what troops are moving where and not around Randle El's second game at receiver, quarterback, punt returner and punter. American flags will fly across the IU landscape, and the band will likely blast "America the Beautiful," "God Bless America" and the national anthem. \nWill this cautious and aware attitude become a mainstay of American life? Will American flags and thoughts of terrorism overcome people wandering toward their seats? Will fans glance toward the sky every few plays in fear of another attack? \nThe sports world got its first test Monday, when baseball resumed its schedule. IU will get its first big test Saturday. But it isn't really a test. Sports matter. They entertain millions, stir emotions and provide an outlet. But if IU wins or loses doesn't really matter. Life and love matter. \nI'll resume my prediction-laden column and normal schedule Thursday, but without the same vigor or passion for wins and losses. I can't decide if that's good or bad, if that's letting terrorism win or if I've finally gained the correct perspective on the way balls bounce, roll and spin. I'll still curse and fume over broken plays and blown games, but not like before. \nI'm just a little disappointed in myself -- and everyone else -- that it's taken this long to get there.