Sexpert

Dear Sexpert,\nMy boyfriend really wants me to perform oral sex on him, but I am a little unsure of my technique, because I don't have a lot of experience. So my question is, what's the best way to give a blow job?\nLollipop\nDear Lollipop,\nAs with all questions of this variety, I have to preface this by saying that, of course, all men are different. Their bodies and their tastes for pleasure can vary widely from one guy to the next, so there is no one tried-and-true oral technique guaranteed to turn any guy into putty in your hands. But if you ask your partner for a little positive reinforcement, I'm sure he'd be more than happy to oblige.\nThat said, don't approach the guy's penis as though you're trying to find the fastest route to the soft, chewy center of a Tootsie Roll pop.\nThere's no need to rush things. Take time to explore the parts of his body that are normally hidden. The head of the penis is far more sensitive than the shaft, and this is important for many reasons. For one thing, some guys report that this area is too sensitive for direct stimulation, right off the bat. So begin gently: try to get a feel for how sensitive he is, and how much pressure he wants you to apply with your tongue or lips. He might prefer that you approach this area indirectly, with some gentle, teasing flickings of the tongue.\nMake sure to be careful around the oh-so-sensitive head. At the same time, don't worry about how much of your partner's penis you can actually take in your mouth. Like I said before, the shaft is not particularly sensitive, so there's really no need to risk gagging yourself in an attempt to pull off deep-throat.\nDon't take the use of your hands for granted. Many men like to have their testicles cradled or caressed (gently, please) in their partner's hand while having fellatio performed on them. You can also use your hand as a back-up for your mouth. If, for example, you feel you aren't\nable to produce enough pressure with your mouth alone, your hands can pick up some of the slack. You might also wish to allow your hands take over for a while if your jaw starts to get tired.\nThe best thing to do is to alternate your techniques. Switch from gentle tongue swirling to serious sucking to solo hand action. Very few men just lie passively while their partners work so hard to please them -- you'll probably be able to pick up pretty easily on whether or not he likes what you're doing. But one thing is for sure: Never, should your teeth be involved. Teeth and penises just don't mix.\nThen there's that other age-old blow job mystery: To spit or swallow? Well, neither. There's a wealth of new evidence that shows HIV can be transmitted through oral sex. That leaves you with one option: Condoms, condoms, condoms. By slipping on a condom, you can eliminate the whole spit-or-swallow issue all together. And you can choose from a myriad of tasty condoms.\nBut above all, communicate with your partner about his preferences. Ask him to tell you what feels good and what doesn't. If you're both operating on the same wavelength, your blow jobs don't have to suck.