Road to the cure of social awkwardness

I’m a sucker for online quizzes.

I found a quiz on the New York Times’ website about one’s ability to read emotions.

The quiz consists of several photographs cropped to only show a pair of eyes. Every set of eyes is different. Four emotions are listed under each photo. The quiz-taker’s goal is to decipher which emotion the eyes show.

The grading scale broke down into three general areas of skill.

Anything under 22 meant you probably have a hard time interpreting someone’s emotions from their facial expressions. A score between 22 and 30, where I scored, is average. And anything above 30 meant you are likely very adept at sensing and understand someone’s mental state.

I scored 30 out of 36, much to my surprise, which put me at the highest end of the average range. I was one point away from practically being a mind reader.

The quiz was created as part of a new research study about social skills. The study found that people who read more literary fiction have a greater gift for understanding emotions.

Psychology professor Emanuele Castano and doctoral candidate David Comer Kidd are the masterminds behind the study. They had people from ages 18 to 75 read different works of literature and then measured their emotional intelligence, social perception and empathy through tests, like the photo one. Those who read literary fiction scored higher.

According to the researchers, this is because literary fiction makes the imagination work harder. Readers have to pay close attention to how a character is feeling. You have to put yourself in that character’s shoes.

Before you get any crazy ideas, popular fiction does not count. The study found that those who read popular fiction before taking one of the tests scored as badly as those who had not read anything at all.

More proof that “Twilight” rots the brain. Thank you, doctors.

I don’t know about you, but social awkwardness is one of my best personality traits. Coupled with my gift for sarcasm, I’m a volcano of charm that will likely remain dormant and never speak to you.

Talking to people is hard. It’s tiring to think of what to say to someone else, especially someone you don’t know. You just start asking them all these questions like a crazy interviewer or a nosy stalker. I don’t want to seem like a crazy interviewer or a nosy stalker, so I keep my mouth shut.

I’m still left wondering how this will help people in social situations. In the middle of your preparations for a night out are you supposed to take a few minutes to read? Finish a chapter after your makeup and you’re set?

But then what?

Being able to read emotions doesn’t make you a better socializer. It doesn’t make it any easier to speak. It may give you a little more insight into what another person is thinking or feeling, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be comfortable enough to remark on it.

If the key to good social skills is being sought after, personal expression needs to be the focus. The biggest cause of social awkwardness is not knowing how to express yourself, not knowing how to converse or how to express emotions.

If you want to be a better socializer you need to look at yourself before other people. Knowing what someone is thinking is no help if you’re too scared to even say “hi.”
    
­— lnbanks@indiana.edu
Follow columnist Lexia Banks on Twitter @LexiaBanks.