Students of the night

Monkeying around

One evening on the night owl bus, my boyfriend and I decided that it was definitely a good idea to try and swing from the handrails inside the bus as if they were monkey bars.

I somehow ended up hanging almost completely upside down from a handrail for a good 1-2 minutes, swinging gently while the bus was moving. No one said anything to me about it.

My boyfriend sat at the other end of the bus and pretended not to know me while suppressing laughter.

It was not my best moment, to say the least. I’m just glad I didn’t injure myself. It was funny at the time but I was being obnoxious.

I apologize to that poor bus driver, and to those girls who had to witness my idiocy. I was that person. Don’t be like me, kids.

­— kelfritz@indiana.edu

Surfers of the world

You know who we are.

Yes, we’re having just a little too much fun on this late night bus ride.

With eyes a tiny bit red, paranoia in full swing and, of course, uncontrollable laughter.

We look out the front window, a bit too close to the bus driver and grin.

Look at all that land moving so quickly beneath our feet.

Well, that’s downright amazing, and our eyes fill with wonder.

We exchange quick, understanding glances at each other, and we know what’s about to happen.

We assume our traditional titanic positions and let out our battle cry, “We are the surfers of the world” and so we are.

­— jkaneshi@indiana.edu

Basic bitches

We’ve all experienced the unfortunate circumstance of being on the drunk bus with a gaggle of basic bitches.

They aren’t difficult to spot. Just follow the sound of squealing and the scent of cheap desperation. Their footwear, be it Uggs, Toms or Sperrys, is typically adorned in an assaulting amount of colorful sparkles.

They’ve forgone pants for predictably unflattering leggings. Look carefully and you can see where their natural hair color battles with the color they swear didn’t come out of a
CVS-bought bottle.

But there’s nothing more basic than not hiding your alcohol or sacrificing the decency of a thermos just to prove to everyone on the bus that you are as big of a mess as you look.

­— wdmcdona@indiana.edu