Keep Calm and Carry on:How to make friends in a strange, far away place

Question: I got a summer internship in San Francisco, and I am so excited but so scared! I don’t know anyone there. I am afraid of having no friends around all summer. What’s your advice on meeting people and making friends when moving to a new city?
Answer: Congratulations. One of the most exciting opportunities we have at our current age is the ability to travel to and try out new places.

With all the students moving to new cities after graduation, for summer internships or traveling abroad, you certainly are not alone and have a huge support net.

Recognize this as an incredible chance to see an incredible city, get a feel for San Francisco’s unique culture and branch out by building your confidence and putting yourself out there. Here are some hints on how to make a new city your own.

1. Get out there. In today’s world, we are lucky enough to have access to our parents, best friends and even pets with a single click. Your current support network isn’t going anywhere, and you aren’t losing them just by moving away for a while. Go out to new venues and be open in showing off those fun, admirable characteristics your friends love about you. Making friends is much easier with a big smile and confidence.

Don’t be afraid to ask people at work where to hang out, what to do for fun and how to make the most of your time. You will find that people love to help and reach out when they love their city and feel appreciated.

2. Find the connection. Reach out and find someone who lives or knows people in your new city. Even if it is your old roommate’s grandmother, one person leads to a whole network of people. Someone will know somebody who would love to tell you about the new city and introduce you to someone in your age group.

Of course, not everyone is bound to be your best friend, but the more people you meet, the more connections you make and the more opportunities you have to grow and make friends during your summer.

When you reach out, it is sure to pay off, and knowing at least one person will make your new city feel more like home.

3. Hunt out your hobbies. What do you like to do? Are you a huge sports fan? Love to paint? Enjoy going to concerts? Your hobbies become really important when seeking out like-minded friends in a new city. San Francisco has numerous events, fairs and festivals to keep your planner full and your options open.

With lots of new students moving in for jobs, for some beachy weather or for a new life, you will find the new kids on the block in the places where they are comfortable doing what they like to do.

Be outgoing and ready to practice talking and smiling. Worst case scenario, it will be over in a few months. But if you choose to go out with a smile, after a summer in a new city, you will come home with a whole new network and as a different person.

­— espitzer@indiana.edu