Access issues can create tension between parents, student

College allows a lot of freedom compared to high school, but before freshmen can get used to curfew-free lives and diets of ramen noodles, they have the freedom of deciding how much access to give their parents to their college lives.

OneStart has a third-party access setting that students can assign to any person, like a parent or guardian.

It grants that person access to the student’s information including grades, unofficial transcripts, class schedules and more personal information such as addresses and phone numbers.

Students can assign third-party access to as many people as they wish, so both mom and dad can keep tabs on their child’s grades.

But some students might choose not to allow third-access to anyone, and that can create tension.

Sophomore and environmental science major Kate Drass said her parents left the decision to her, and while she allowed them access, she kept her grades private.
“With grades specifically, it’s about letting go of control,” she said. “It’s the kid’s
responsibility now.”

Drass said keeping that information inaccessible to her parents has actually helped with communication about academics.

“They’ll ask, but we have that communication that I can say I might not be doing so well in one class. I feel more willing to talk about it with them,” she said. “If we have that communication rather than them having direct access to my grades, it’s better for us.”

Counseling and Psychological Services has similar advice for parents when dealing with letting go of complete access to their child’s life.

Regular communication about expectations can make it easier to avoid tension with our child, according to the website.

If parents assume their child will want to give them access to every financial and academic detail but their child assumed that access stopped at high school graduation, communicating why each party felt that way can help.

“Parents need to realize their kids are in college now,” Drass said. “It’s all about growing up and becoming responsible.”